Inmate Looking for a Penmate

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Since the whole Gavin thing has been a wash, I've decided to start shopping around for someone else. You know my theory...best way to get over one is with another...not that I have much to get over b/c WTF was I thinking?! (Rhetorical question btw)
Tonight, I was bored and decided to see what was going on with Craig's List (CL) these days. I found some freaking hilarious stuff that was too good...could NOT resist sharing. For the record, I didn't respond to these. I'm sure you guys think my standards are in the toilet, so I feel compelled to clarify even I have limits. ;)

"Inmate looking for Penmate" ad
I am incarcerated in Arizona at the present time with many other inmates from Hawaii. Due to lack of space on Oahu, the state flies us here until we are almost ready to become free again. I will be FREE AGAIN in 5 months time. I am in prison for a burglary charge and I have paid my dues. Now I am ready to make a new start and am looking for the right woman to make my life complete. I was raised in Kalihi and am easy going. I love to enjoy life and would like to find a pretty lady who wants to share life together. We will have 5 months to get to know one another until the day I return to Hawaii as a free man.
Please mail me a letter telling me about yourself, along with a recent picture to:
Saguaro Correctional Center
1252 East Arica Road
Eloy, Arizona
Once I receive your letter, I will write back and give you a picture of mine. If you have any questions, feel free to email back. Thanks.

I deleted his name, but seriously?? Dude, if anyone responds to this ad, they should be shot.

Here's my next fave. It's titled "We are all Sinners".
But in Gods eyes we are all perfect. I know sex before marriage is a sin, but I cannot take it anymore. I need to unleash! Are you a good Christian girl who feels the same? Lets do this together then we can pray about it after, asking for forgiveness.

Good stuff...I am not praying after sex. There's a lot of mentioning of God during sex, but not so much before or after. I don't make this stuff up by the way...check out that section of CL one day. It's a riot.
-Jules

Comments

  1. MirandaMarch 27, 2010 at 9:10 PM

    CL does provide great amusement! It cracks me up everytime I look at it.

    ReplyDelete

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