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Monday, June 23, 2014

Boring Jules

Josie just texted me and said she couldn't believe I have been home alone for over a week and nothing blog worthy has happened. Life has gotten weird. I think I'm processing. Russell moved away in February for a new job. He got fired from said job last week in the biggest case of self sabotage ever because he missed us and Hawaii. So, he is moving back and in with Chloe and I. It is strictly a roommate situation with my BFF, but it's admittedly a little weird, even for me. They come home mid-July.

I am talking to The Chilean again, minimally. I like him, but I don't think we are ever meant to be anything more than friends. I like talking to him though, he's a good friend. He told me the other night he thinks The Fisherman is gay. If you read this, I hope you know he's not the first person to mention this and perhaps it's why you are so angry and have now had three wives, just saying.
No divorce papers have magically appeared from his "attorney" yet...sigh. He sucks a lot.

There is one crazy plot twist going on in my life at the moment, but it feels risky in that I feel like I could lose a friend out of it in the long run, so I am avoiding it. Polly, my friend I just stayed with for a few weeks in town, has the boyfriend I mentioned. She really has feelings for him, a lot. She's married and swears she won't act on them but I feel like her marriage is doomed and at some point things are going to change. Anyway, her bf who we will call Superman, is pressing me hard to hang out and hook up. He's cute and very charming and not a criminal, but because she has feelings I think it would hurt her and I am enough of an adult not to lose her friendship over some cock. The other interesting twist is that he, and then they, wanted to go to a sex party with me. They know I've been to swinger parties before, but I bailed. It feels weird going with them. He doesn't share the same feelings for her and I just see it ending poorly whether or not I fuck him or not. If they go, it's on them but I'm not going to be the catalyst.

Owen is off island on family vacation until July 5th, I think I'm content waiting on him to get back and then the whole family returns for cohabitation again. I'll try to spice things up around here soon!
-Jules

PS Remember the Gavin clone? Superman apparently ran into him the other day. He didn't move home but instead reunified with his wife and now they are homeless living on the beach and sleeping on some $3 pool mats Superman gave him. Oh and strung out...I think that played into my calming down too.

Saturday, June 7, 2014

Stupid Is As Stupid Does

Well if it wasn't affirmed before today, I married an idiot (The Fisherman) the second time. Good lord I had pet rocks as a child that were smarter, no kidding.  I have also discovered that he's a criminal and a liar. He told me he went to FSU, um he didn't. According to the newspaper article about his first marriage, he went to the University of Alaska. He also failed to mention the multiple fishing charges that were filed against him in 2010 in that state too. It seems my mama had googled him and when I got curious and did the same, I found out about the college lie.  Lesson learned, google people before marrying them!!
So in other news, it seems I must have his address to file divorce papers. I emailed him today to ask for it and hilarity ensued. First he told me I had to talk to his Atty to get it, uh ok you make about half of what I do and you have any atty? Then he told me I was violating the tro, I'm not. The cops told me that night he violated it that I can contact him, he just can't contact me. In this case, I needed him too so I wasn't going to report him but omg his responses got hilarious in the end. Apparently his atty (lmao) is on vacation but is simply waiting to file the divorce papers. I replied "Great, thanks for saving me the filing fees! They can serve me at work, address is on the tro.". This didn't set well and he proceeded to go on about how he's the one divorcing me and I would have to pay half. I will pay the whole gd thing if it means being rid of his sorry ass, which is likely what's going to happen anyway because trust me, he does not have a lawyer. So, I gave him until the first of July and then I file and they publish it and eventually grant me a divorce anyway.  You could tell from all of his replies that he is super pissed at me and yet trying to have the upper hand.
Then he told me that he found the blog on Facebook and knows about my past, all of which he knew about minus Owen before we were married. I literally laughed at him and told him that it wasn't news and that I assumed he knew because he threw up me seeing Owen one time after I met him! So I've always known that he knew, but Hawaii is a no fault state so it doesn't matter at this point how much he knows or not.
An idiot, a liar,and a criminal...I really went all out on this one.
-Jules
PS My mama is really letting it all spill out now too since she knows I'm never going back to him. She told me today that my brother called her once and asked why the Fisherman had boobs. She told him he used to be a girl. Lmao, he believed her for a moment but in reality it's just because he got depressed when he lost his job and got fat, but her answer was way funnier.