Sunday, July 31, 2011

Final Thoughts

I’ve blown up the blog this weekend so I figured I’d post one more update before I imagine I’ll enter some silent time as I lick my wounds. 

Late last night Coach did call me.  He tried to play the pity card hard about but I wasn’t hearing any of it.  He said he had called my bluff about showing up at her house because he thought no way would I actually take things that far.  He said he’d stayed gone and non communicative so much of yesterday because he knew I was going to be mad and he hoped I’d have time to cool down.  WTF? 

I asked him what he really expected to have happen after yesterday. Did he think I was going to be ok last night when he popped by to finally say hello? Did he think I’d just let it slide?  I told him he’d made his choice when he packed up his stuff and walked out yesterday.  He knew what was going to happen and he forced my hand.  He kept saying how sorry he was and that I deserved so much more.  And he’s right. I do deserve so much more, that’s why I had to do what I did.

He texted me a couple times after that and today. Just more of the same. He’s sorry and he’s hurting and he didn’t want this to happen. I’m not budging an inch though.  He did this. Not me.  I told him I hoped he went and got his issues handled because if he doesn’t, he may as well remarry the EX because no one is going to put up with all this shit.  

I’m sad, but not like last time. Mostly I’m mad and pissed off.  I hate that he turned out to be such a disappointment.  I had really started to think that there could be a future there, albeit down the road a ways.  It definitely had turned into a situation of loving his potential more than his reality.  It just sucks.  Even though it was the right thing, hell the only thing I could do to stand up for myself, my heart still hurts from it.


Saturday, July 30, 2011

Fuck You

Well it’s done.  About 7:45 I was out running errands and saw Coach’s car at the Ex’s house. My anger got the better of me and I texted him and told him he had until 9 pm to show his face at my apartment or I was coming to her house to talk to him.  After ignoring my text all day that sure got his fucking attention.

He texted right back and asked if I was joking.  I told him I’d never been more serious in my life.  He said if you come here I’ll be so mad.  I didn’t answer him.

About 8:15 he said he was playing with his boys and would call me ASAP.  I said I sure hoped it was before 9.  8:45 came and I got a text that he was getting ready to leave.  9 pm came and no call or appearance so Miranda called his bluff and got in her fucking car.

The EX lives less than a mile from me so I zipped over there and parked at the end of her street and tried to call him. I got a text back to chill out so I told him I was chilling at the end of her street.  No answer.  So 5 minutes later I texted him and said I was walking up to his car.  And I did. 

He texted me and said I better not make a scene and I said I wasn’t trying to be he gave me no choice.  At this point a friendly neighbor came out to sit on their porch and asked if I was ok. I said yes just waiting on a friend. They went in after a minute and I texted him and asked if I really needed to knock.  About that time he came outside and looked shocked to find me leaning against his car in front of her house.

He immediately started trying to shoo me towards my car and the EX started walking out of the house after him.  He took off walking towards my car and asked what I was doing. I said you gave me no choice. I left you shit on your trunk now give me my key.  His dumb ass looked so confused and he said, “What? I can’t believe you came here.”

He gave me my key and I got in my car and left as he walked back towards his car and the EX glowered in my direction.  I promptly came home, un-relationshiped myself with him on Facebook and sent a quick message to his mom and sister letting them know what happened. I’m not going to let him lie about it to them or pretend we’re still together.

A few minutes ago I got a text from him saying he was going to call me when he “calmed down.” Whatever dude.  You’re a fucking idiot. 


Sealing His Own Fate

I woke up this morning and got up before Coach. I was hopefully that today would go better than last night. I got on my gym clothes and was sitting on the couch when he got up.  We talked for a few minutes and things felt ok.  He said he was going to go over to his parents while I was at the gym. 

He jumped in the shower and I heard his phone ring.  As a joke a long time ago I set the ringtone to be the wicked witch theme for his crazy EX and that’s who was calling.  He got out of the shower and I told him the EX had called and he said I wonder what she wants.  I laughed bitterly and said you know she wants to know when you’re coming to see the boys.  He said that wasn’t going to happen and he kissed me bye and I went to the gym.

55 hard minutes later I finished on the elliptical and strolled out to my car feeling mildly refreshed after getting out some long held aggression.  I jumped in the car and pulled out my phone and had a couple text messages. One from Gwyn and one from Coach.  Coach’s said, “You were right. I’m going to take the boys to lunch.”

I didn’t text him back.  I went home and jumped in the shower and started getting ready to head down to the pool for a few hours when I noticed he’d taken all his stuff with him. Guess he knew I was going to be pissed and he wasn’t going to be welcome back here today.  I caved to my anger down by the pool and sent him a text asking why he was running (again) and why he wouldn’t do what was right.  He responded, “I hate being pulled like this. You deserve better than this and it just kills me that everyone can’t be together.”  I said back, “You’re right I do deserve better. And according to you we can all be together. You’re just choosing to shut me out.” 

No response in the following six hours.  I bet good money he’ll get drunk and text me tonight.  I will admit it’s hard not to text him. I feel like I want to rail and rant at him.  It won’t do any good though.  Everything I’d say he’s already heard before. 

It feels weird. When we broke up before I was so upset and sad.  I kind of feel just angry, frustrated, and weirdly blank thinking that this is going to be the end of us.  I’ve been thinking about it this week. Kind of probing the idea with my mind, seeing how I’d feel so maybe I’ve just prepared myself more for it to end this time. 

Now I just need to get my damn key back from him.


Just Pray

When my fairly affluent grandparents met my Daddy for the first time, this was the phrase my grandmother used in response to the meeting. "Just pray"...pray that he doesn't end up a part of this family. Today, my Mama met Gavin with much the same reception.

Both of them were very curious about the other, so I decided to let it go forth. I decided that it would be ok to introduce Gavin to my mother because I knew that if I didn't facilitate it happening, he would just show up at some point and better to do it when I had some control of it. He called me like 4 times this morning before I finally told him that we were at a certain beach and he could come by if he wanted.

He did in fact come by and chatted my Mama up the entire time, but when he left (after several redirection reminders of boundaries since he was talking to MY mama) she had nothing to say. This is my Mama's way of just keeping things pleasant. In true Southern lady form, if she doesn't have anything nice to say she usually will keep quiet.

At dinner and after several glasses of wine, Russell was sort of egging her on since he knew they had met and she finally asked what was the deal. I told her that he's just for fun. We're not going anywhere serious due to his lack of stable housing, lack of steady employment, and current gf situation and she was honestly relieved. She said "Oh thank God because I was having a 'Just Pray' moment!". She praised my "just for fun" approach (and if you've met the Mama you know this is HUGE as she does not typically approve of my whorish ways) and noted that he has an awfully hot body and good for me for finding someone so cute to have fun with (read fuck).

So, Gavin has the Mama seal of approval for a fuck toy but nothing more...ever. There you have it folks, there is the Mama's opinion. And on a funny side note, he's called twice since their meeting. Once I called him back and he noted how much he liked her. Sadly for him, the feeling is only semi-mutual.

Friday, July 29, 2011

Sucker Punched

Well Miranda’s weekend is off to a raging start.  After a long Gwyn-less day at work, I hit the batting cages for some post work stress relief and had an actually fun lingering dinner with my mom and sister in law. Coach was on his way home and I was actually feeling a little hopeful and positive about this weekend. 

I got home about 10 pm.  Coach got here about 10:15.  We reunion kissed, albeit a bit warily since we’ve been fussing lately.  He started his post drive routine of jumping in the shower to freshen up for what was sure to be some good sex and literally before his pants were all the way off his phone rang. It was his oldest son calling and wanting Coach to come and pick the boys up and take them home. 

They’ve been staying with their grandma the last few days while their mom traveled for work. Apparently her plane is getting in an hour and a half later than it was supposed to so their grandma had the oldest boy call Coach to see if he’d come get them and take them home so they could be there waiting for their mom. 

He didn’t tell me all that right away. Instead he walked back out in the living room and sat down in his boxers. I asked what was going on and he shrugged his shoulders.  I asked what his son wanted and he told me.  Instantly my blood pressure rose and if I was a cartoon character I’m sure my eyes would have popped out of my head and the blood would have made my head swell until steam rolled out of my ears.

With surprising force I kept my mouth shut.  He asked if I was going to be mad if he went and I told him I wasn’t going to keep him from his kids.  He tried to probe for more but I told him I didn’t really think I needed to give my opinion. My temper did slip a bit and I couldn't resist saying if we had a normal relationship the boys would come hang out here with us until their mom got home. Coach walked back in my bedroom and lay across the bed for a few minutes and I could tell he was agonizing about the decision. 

I walked in there and said he should go because he’s going to feel worse about letting the boys down in the end.  He said he didn’t want me to be mad or have my feelings hurt.  I said again I’d never tell him not to see his kids but he knew how I felt about the situation and that this was impeccable timing and showed everything wrong with his relationship with his ex and with me. 

I walked back out in the living room and he got dressed and came out here and sat for another 10 minutes or so while I texted Gwyn to keep from shouting out that this was fucking bullshit and throwing his shit off my balcony.  Finally I just looked at him and smiled and said just go, that’s what you need to do.  He said something to the effect of not wanting this to set the tone for the whole weekend and I pretty much just sat and stared at the TV to keep from swearing at him. 

He said he’d be back in about an hour but I think Miranda is going to take her silent ass to bed before he gets back.  He was here for 33 freaking minutes start to finish. A new record for a relationship TKO. Happy fucking Friday everyone.


Edited to add he was back after only about 45 minutes and jumping like mad to try and make me laugh or act like everything was ok. I did neither.  We finally went to bed and layed there taking for a while before he put the moves on me.  I gave in because hell it's been over two weeks since we had sex and everything was food there.  Afterwards we were talking again and he asked if we were ok now and I started laughing and said just because we had sex doesn't change a damn thing between us.  He looked like I kicked a puppy.  Men are so stupid.  

Best Text Ever...

On the way to get Chloe and my mom today, I got the best text ever from Owen. It also made me literally laugh out loud.

Owen: " I was in the store yesterday and looked down at my shirt and it was covered in your pussy juices from when I had it on while fucking you". (Initially yesterday, we didn't even bother to get undressed fully until it was time for the hard core fucking,)

Next text a few minutes later because I was driving and couldn't reply just yet " So I wiped my face with it!"

Thursday, July 28, 2011

Just Some Good Ole Sex

I was disappointed on an epic level yesterday at 4:25am when United called to tell me that Chloe and my Mom would not be arriving that day as planned. Their flights were cancelled on one of the legs and they couldn't get out to get here until today. It worked out in the end though and I had time to clean the house some in my manic way. It also afforded some great sex time for one last night of kid free fun.

First off, I had been up until 12:15am the night before texting with Owen. He wanted to meet up yesterday and we arranged to meet before work...at 7am. I'm so not a morning person, but I will get up for sex anytime. He did not disappoint. It was actually amazing as always and I got to learn a little something else about him which has made me chuckle repeatedly since. I've always thought that he had perfect vision, it turns out he does not. Not only does he not have perfect vision, sometimes he wears glasses. These glasses are the total black rimmed geek glasses. They looked freaking adorable on him, but it was so unexpected as this is not his persona at all! He had them on when I got into his van yesterday and realized it quickly and ripped them off.

I climbed in and sat on his seat in the back. He started kissing me (gawd he's a great kisser) and pulled my dress up. He moved down and went down on me forever and fingered me until I came several times. Then he came up, started kissing me some more, and very slowly entered me while keeping his face very close to mine but not touching me. HOT! He moved my legs around and had them in various positions but my favorite was when he held them together and bent over to kiss me while sliding his big cock in and out of me. Finally he sensed I was ready for harder and he took me off the seat and gave it to me doggie style. He knows I love dominance in sex, so he pushed me down and put his body onto me and fucked me so amazingly hard. Finally he entered my ass and exploded in there after giving me a few more orgasms.

He was feeling very sensual and there was lots of kissing and touching. I assume this is because things are sucking so much for him at home, He said things are pretty much the same there, but didn't really elaborate. I think she's going to have to be the one to blow up again (which probably won't take long), but I do see him leaving by the end of the year. I feel so badly for him because I know how hard all of these changes can be.

I talked to Gavin around lunchtime and told him Chloe wasn't coming home as planned and he offered to cook me dinner. I came home after work and we smoked some and drank some wine. He's been really sweet lately, but I know he's torn over this whole gf thing. Honestly, I am too. Part of me sees how easy it would be just fall in with him if she moves, which is highly likely, but part of me feels like Miranda just said...it would be like dating a kid. Plus, I think I would feel like his second choice since we're only going to be together if she moves. It's weird. I'm not used to feeling these kind of things. Anyway, back to the great sex...

He made us (and Russell) a great dinner of crab legs, steak, salad, etc. It was fabulous. We all drank and smoked some more and then he and I went inside to watch a movie when Russell went to bed. About 30 minutes into the movie, we had to pause for sex. I had been laying on his lap using my fingers to run up and down his cock. He was super hard! He took me into my room, laid me on the bed, pulled my legs over his shoulders and fucked me soooooo hard. He pulled out and came all over my tits. He's definitely improved the sex lately. It's always good, but it's been really really good lately. We went back out and finished the movie and then he slept over again. I blew him before we slept and then rolled over for 8 blissful hours of much needed rest!!

He got up this morning and washed my car for me and helped me clean things up for my mom's visit. I'm on the way to get Chloe now, so there will likely be about a week sex hiatus while the mother is here visiting!

There She Blows!

Yesterday I chewed out Coach for acting like a frat boy and for the kid situation.  I’ve been struggling with the long distance lately and I think it just has built up and came out in volcanic proportions yesterday.  Ok maybe not volcanic but it was definite a geyser of frustration. 

I don’t know what’s going on.  July has just been a bad month for us.  Our communication has been off and frankly, he’s been getting on my nerves lol.  The acting like a college frat boy is my realization that many of Coach’s bad habits come from him living like a party boy for the last three years with little if any responsibilities.  He’s still very much a fly by the seat of his pants kind of guy.  I mean hell he doesn’t even budget his money.  Just spends whatever he wants whenever he wants (which has led to him overdrawing his account more than once in the last few months).  Constantly reinjuring his self.  I really don’t want to bitch about his faults.  We all have them but I think at the root of it is I’m starting to feel like I’m a grown up dating a college kid and it’s annoying me right now. 

The part of my eruption with the kid situation led me to essentially accuse him of lying by asking if he even had an actual custody agreement.  He swears he does and through the “conversation,” he told me his oldest son, who is 11, has expressed not wanting to be around me.  Coach said he’s been trying to talk to him some and figure out what’s going on. 

I told him he was the parent and after 8 months of dating if he was going to let his 11-year-old make decisions for our relationship then I wasn’t going to be in this relationship.  I told him it was time to be a grown up and fix the situation.  Yeah I essentially threw out an ultimatum and that’s never a good sign. He's coming home this weekend so we'll just have to wait and see how it goes I suppose.

I know I’m frustrated with him and that long distance relationships are harder than normal ones but I’m also just generally frustrated with life.  I kind of wonder if I’m so frustrated with other things that I can’t change, that I’m picking apart our relationship since it’s one of the few things I can “control.”  Does that make sense?  I’m also starting to think I may really have some low-grade rolling depression going on for some reason.  I guess I need to keep an eye on that and my therapist on speed dial in case I need a mental health check up.


Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Lessons In Objectivity

I don’t know what is going on in the universe right now, but it seems like every single person I know (literally) is in some kind of change, transformation, metamorphosis, etc. I don’t mean the normal kind either…I mean big, life altering kind of change. I’m also taking a class right now on Native Hawaiian practices with regards to setting things right in the universe. One of the practitioners worked at the State Hospital years ago as the clinical director of the criminally insane ward. In four years, he worked himself out of a job using this practice. When he started at the hospital, no one wanted to work there. Inmates were shackled all day and on very high doses of psychotropic meds. Using ho’oponopono, the Dr. worked on an individual level and cured these people. He took their names, read their files, and never met with the patients individually. This was a radical approach for sure, but it worked and at the end of his time the ward closed b/c there were no more inmates. They had all been relocated to less restrictive environments.
In this practice, you assume 100% responsibility for your world. You don’t assume fault, but you acknowledge that your world is your creation, a reflection of your perceptions. When doing ho’oponopono on an individual level (as it is typically done within a family and/or community setting), you reflect on what your role has been in that person’s life and how your errors may have reflected on them. You own your responsibility, reflect on those errors, and ask the Divine (not a specific religion per say) to correct those errors and cleanse that part. One of the Dr’s quotes is “Didn’t you notice that whenever you experience a problem, you are there?”.  One of our readers, Kenny, implied this much once in a comment to one of my posts. It really hit a nerve on that particular post, but he was spot on.
This morning on the way to work, I ended up behind Owen. I sent him a text and he responded and he promptly poured his heart out for the next 3 hours. It was kind of unexpected because I thought things were better, but he told me that he and his wife haven’t spoken for 3 days and he knows that this is the end. He said he just can’t take it anymore and has to get out of this marriage. It seems she’s very verbally abusive to him and the kids and he’s just done. He said he doesn’t have the energy yet for the final fight, but he’s starting to make some plans on what to do and how to get out. We talked a lot today about his situation and my heart is breaking for him over how emotionally raw he is and how much he just wants to keep his kids. He’s stayed for a long time because of them and his fear that she’s going to take them from him. He told me at one point that he’s worked so hard on their house and it’s so beautiful and he just wants his kids to always have that. We talked a lot about my situation and how Russell and I have handled it and Chloe’s response to it. I told him kids are resilient, but that they pick up on things and I relayed how my parents stayed together for my brother’s sake and how now my brother resents my Dad b/c my Dad is an addict. He acknowledged that he drinks way to much every day and that he could easily see that happening if he stayed.  I listened and let him talk and vent.  It made me sad though.
It is not my fault that his marriage is falling apart. That started years before we even met. I am however responsible for my role in it. He’s not leaving to be with me. I’m not the direct cause, but my involvement with him has had an impact. I’ve told myself for years that if he wasn’t having an affair with me, he would be having one with someone else. I truly believe that, but I also recognize that when he told me last year that they were trying to work it out and give it one final try that I should have backed off and quit seeing him. I told him then that he couldn’t truly work on his marriage and continue to see me, but he told me that I wasn’t responsible for him and I just went with it. I own that. Now that being said, I’m not going to quit seeing him at this point either, but I need to make some amends for my part in this. I’m just not sure how other than to recognize it right now. That’s a lie…I know how. It would be to quit seeing him until he leaves, but I’m not there. So that was in interesting start to my Monday morning and then Gavin called…
Gavin called me this morning and I could tell immediately that he was in a funk. We chatted for a second and then he told me that he’d talked very briefly to the gf and she told him that she’s making plans to leave. She’s unemployed and her kid is moving from her house in HI to his Dad’s house in CA and she wants to move back to CA to be with him and her family (which is where she is right now and for the next 2 weeks). She’s talked about it the entire time I’ve known him, but this time seems different since all these other factors are in play. He said he was upset that their relationship wasn’t enough to keep her here. I explained that he’s known for a long time that things weren’t right there. I explained to him that if he was truly happy in that relationship and if it was everything he had it built up as in his mind that he wouldn’t be with me. I told him that as soon as they got back together last year, he knew it was a mistake and a last ditch effort or he would have quit seeing me and he didn’t. I’m owning my responsibility in this one too though, but I feel way less guilty about it. Their relationship has been so on again-off again for years and years that while I know I’ve contributed to it’s instability this time, but I think in a far less impactful manner than in Owen’s situation.
When people are unhappy, they look for happiness in any way they can find it. I did. Gavin and Owen are. When Russell and I started having problems, I looked elsewhere. It took me 3 years to get up the courage to ask for a divorce, but I can’t tell you how much happier we are now. Just because something is familiar, doesn’t make it good for you. I get why Owen is so afraid of this change with the kids and all, I’ve been there. I think most of you reading this are there and/or have been as well. With Gavin, I think it’s literally just his fear of change and his inability to not be in a relationship. When we talk about the gf, he always goes back to the concept that it’s just familiar b/c they’ve been together for so long. Personally, I think that’s a lame excuse.
So lots of changes seem to be on the horizon…I’ve decided to just be still and let what happens happen, but I really wish I had a crystal ball right now.

Monday, July 25, 2011

He's a Dumbass but I Love Him.

Well I did get to see Coach this weekend but not quite in the way I expected.  Saturday afternoon playing basketball with his boys, he landed wrong somehow and sprained his heel.  Yes his heel.  WTF?

He managed to get the boys back to their mom and then drove himself to his parents’ house hoping they could take him to the emergency room because he couldn’t put any pressure on his heel at all.  As luck would have it, they weren’t home so he called me.  So I got to spend about two hours schlepping him to the ER, the pharmacy, and back home.

I told him today that the injury wasn’t an excuse for failing to follow through on us spending some time together with our kids.  (He got his kids back for several hours Saturday evening though he didn’t keep them overnight since he was hobbling around on crutches.)  I told him today that I wasn’t trying to rain on his parade but that I wasn’t ok with being shut out yet again from doing anything together with his kids and that it would continue to be an increasing source of tension between us until the situation was rectified.  Harsh maybe, but it’s true. 

Later today we were IMing and I asked him if he was going to be home for Gwyn’s going away party and he made a very poorly timed joke about going on a golfing trip with this guy friend of his who makes it a point to brag about how much he cheats on his wife.  Let it be known that I’ve expressed my clear disapproval of this friend’s activities lol.  I asked if he was kidding and the joke persisted for another minute or two before I called him up at work and gave him holy hell.  He tried to soothe me by apologizing for poor joke and swearing up and down he never would do something like that.

Alas, Miranda’s anger was too great to let him off easy and I had a mini-meltdown in my office though I did resist the urge to hang up on him after blasting him with the fact that he has the worst timing ever for joking (this isn’t the first ill-timed joke of his).  Now he’s groveling over IM trying to get me to be nice to him but he deserves to be punished so Miranda’s staying bitchy for a while yet.

As I predicted earlier this month, July has been hard for us.  Him being injured (re us not being able to have as much sex and him being on prednisone and extra grouchy because of it) and us not seeing each other as much has definitely thrown off the rhythm of our relationship the month.  We need to get it back on track tout de suite.  I think that coupled with my general dissatisfaction with life just makes it seem worse than it really is too.  After much lollygagging with the decision I think it’s time to bite the bullet and take my ass back to school so I can start working towards a nursing degree.  Changing jobs is not going to be enough to keep my happy.  Hold me to it yall!


Sunday, July 24, 2011

Swinger Spin Off Party

Yesterday morning Gavin called me and said that he definitely wanted to go to the party. I agreed and he told me that he needed to come over to my house to do some things like laundry and wash his truck. I had to go  do something for school all afternoon and when I came home, we went and hung out on the beach drinking some beer. Initially Russell had kicked Gavin out for a little while because he was trying to have a boy over, but due to my proximity to coming home, he cancelled it.

Gavin and I came home from the beach and showered together and laid around waiting to go to town to the party. The couple called us with directions on where to go and Gavin and I started getting frisky. Russell was home and awake and we had no noise barriers, but we decided we really needed to fuck right then. I sat on his lap in my desk chair because this is the quietest place for us to fuck and I basically bit my tongue not to scream as I was cumming. After I'd cum, I hopped off of him and sucked him until he came all over my mouth and chin.

When it was time to go to town, we headed to a bar at the hotel and the couple came down to join us for cocktails. The couple hosting bought all of the girls leis. That was a sweet and funny touch. We all hung out at the bar for a while and the other couple from last weekend had to bail because she was having her period. I was kind of looking forward to playing with them again, but another couple was scheduled to come though and when they showed up she was gorgeous. She was from Bali and I can only assume his hooker and/or he's got a shit ton of money. He was an older white guy, not unattractive but obviously a sugar daddy or something. She just didn't match him at all.

We went up to their room and changed into more comfortable things. Gavin had instructed me to bring the black dress and I slipped into that for him. The other girls and the older white guy all went out to smoke and I blew Gavin some and the other guy watched but decided he better wait for permission from his wife to do more. When they came back in, his wife took me over to the bed to start things. She and I started kissing and she started playing with my tits. The other woman quickly joined us and she started sucking on my other one while the men watched. I could see Gavin watching me while standing behind one of them and I was so turned on.

Finally they moved onto their respective men and Gavin took me over to the edge of the bed and threw my legs up, held onto my heels, and fucked me so hard I thought I was going to pass out. It was one of the best times ever with him. I came so hard that I soaked him. I didn't squirt quite like what he was hoping to see, but I definitely came in abundance and he loved it! I can't remember if it was in the middle of this time or if it was another time with him that night, but the Balinese girl came over and started licking my kitty while Gavin was pounding it. She straddled my face, per Gavin's request, and I licked her and fingered her while she did it. She  came and it almost surprised me with the force.

It still seems weird to me having a girl come from me and/or cumming from a girl doing things to me, but it was all in good fun. I was thinking about Owen at one point because I would love to do this with him too. Actually, I felt a little guilty last night (only very briefly!) that I was having this experience again without him. He's been clear on wanting just another girl and not another couple, so the guilt passed.

We switched around and I was fucking the man from last weekend and watching Gavin fuck his wife and the other couple go at it. During this encounter, the man keeps telling me how he's never had anal sex before. Gavin offered me up to him for this activity, but I wasn't sure about right then so I told him we could but it would have to be another night. Plus I wanted to feel out the situation with his wife and make sure it was ok if I gave him that since she won't. I like playing with them and I suppose swinger etiquette calls for making sure things are ok with spouses and such first.

After we came again, we headed out to the club we went to last weekend. It was a fun time as well last night. Gavin and I played darts again and sadly lost to another couple. I was drunnnnnnnk last night and off my game with regards to aim...lol. I was also a little high because at one point the host couple brought out a joint and we smoked while sitting on the beach during this intermission. I remember us leaving and I went out first and sat on the planters outside the club waiting for Gavin to pay and come out. Some younger guys were out there and I remember there was flirting b/c Gavin came out and sat beside me to reclaim his territory and get me to move along.

The rest of the evening is kind of a blur. I remember going back up to their room and they pulled out a fruit and veggie tray and Gavin kept feeding me and then putting food into the kitty and eating it out (literally) while the other couples watched us. We decided to get naked and fuck again and this time I did the older guy after he came over to me while I was blowing Gavin. It was fun and he was hung, but I think he got the vibe that I wasn't totally into him. We fucked for a while though and watched the others play and then they left and I collapsed onto the bed with Gavin for a little bit before we gathered our stuff and headed home.

I crawled into the bed at 4am again last night and woke up at 8:30am to the satellite guy installing a gigantic freaking satellite outside of my bedroom window for the neighbors. The pounding of metal with the slight hangover I'm nursing and lack of sleep was not the ideal wake up, but as I'm laying in bed thinking and writing about last night I'm still turned on by it all. I didn't want Gavin to spend the night last night and I think his kid was at his house anyway, so I guess I'll have to take care of this by myself until he gets here later. ;)

Saturday, July 23, 2011

FWB - The Movie and My Life

Oh lord this would have been funnier if I wasn't so dead tired. I have had 4 14 hour days in a row this week and last night I had every intention of coming home and crashing in my bed. Owen had texted me earlier in the day to see what was up after work, but I'd told him after work for me would be 9pm and he didn't think he could swing that. Then, Gavin called and asked if he could come over and spend the night and I also informed him of my late night, but it seems he had a Home Depot date with his lesbian neighbor, so it worked out perfectly for him to come.

I called him after I got home and showered and he said he was on the way. He called back en route and told me to put on the sexy black dress (remember the Owen sex story? that one...) for him. I had no sooner put it on and put my feet into the super sexy, super slutty shoes when Russell arrived home, promptly followed by Gavin. It was a little bit of buzz kill that Russell had just walked in, but Gavin couldn't take his eyes and hands off of me and pretty soon he was licking and fingering me into powerful orgasms. We continued to fool around very quietly and finally went to bed around 1am.

At 2am, I woke up to the smoke alarms going off. Our alarms will randomly go off and always in the middle of the night when they need a new battery. I didn't have one, so I tried to just reset it. This failed and it kept going off until I finally stood on a stool an hour into the ordeal and ripped the offending alarm from the wall while standing halfway in my nightie with Gavin snoozing in my bed and Russell laughing at me teetering manically on the stool. I was jacked up then and it took me another hour to fall back asleep. Sleeping with Gavin was fun the first night, but it was hot and itchy last night. I have this tic where when I'm sleeping with someone and they are touching me, as he does, I get fidgety and itchy.  Go ahead and read into that one.

Anyway, I fell asleep at 4am and woke up around 6:30am to what I thought was someone pounding on the door. I registered that it couldn't possibly be for me and rolled over. Russell called me from his bedroom to say that it was in fact for me and that the neighbor was complaining about Gavin's truck blocking his car in the driveway. Since I was alert-ish, I went to move it for Gavin but it took 2 trips since the keys weren't in the truck like he'd said and the neighbor was irate at this point. It was a little bit funny. I went back and crawled  in bed to go back to sleep...sigh.

I dozed off about 20 minutes later and woke up at 7:30am to his phone ringing from a guy calling and wanting to buy something from him. Then, I rolled over and about 15 minutes later my boss called to tell me about something at work and to ask if I could come in today. I'm serious. I totally gave up on sleep at that point. I told her I would due to her being my friend and my awareness of some of her personal family problems right now. Originally, Gavin and I had planned to run some errands today and go to eat and see a movie and such.

I had a Dr. appt today and when I dragged myself into my appt, the receptionist wouldn't take my Health Care Spending card because it's in Russell's name. For the 1st time in the 3 years of going there, they had to call him to authorize it (not based on any changes with us mind you) but they did allow me to move into the waiting room for my appt. As I'm sitting in the lobby, kids are hacking nasty little coughs all around. Then one of them coughs so hard, it pukes. Vomit is like the one bodily fluid that I absolutely cannot handle in life. Do you all know the children's book "Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible No Good, Very Bad Day"? That was my night and morning! I didn't move to Australia and fortunately the day improved from this point...drastically.

I went into see my Dr. and I'd lost a few pounds and my blood pressure was great (I don't know how!). It always is though. When I left my appointment to go to work, my boss and I talked and she said she had things under control and I didn't need to come in after all. I called Gavin and told him our day was on and then Russell and I started texting about our situation. He's over being pissed and we talked a lot about the natural vs. unnatural environment we've created for ourselves here regarding outside relationships. It was a great talk and I think we both feel better having said a lot of things.

Gavin and I left to run errands and had a really fun day together. We laughed and talked about a lot of things and went for cocktails and appetizers and smoked some together. It was a really relaxed day. He took me by a friend's house and we sat hanging out by the water and shooting the shit. The next part is a little foggy because of the aforementioned smoking, but we ran through Taco Bell and ate the hell out of some nasty food and went to see FWB. It's a cute, predictable movie and of course they get together in the end (sorry if I ruined that shocker for you). I know most of you think that's what is going to happen with us too, but I'm still voting on it not. We were still a little high after the movie and very mellow and I had moved into too tired to really talk, so we didn't process it...lol.

We did call the couple we met last weekend though on the car ride home and discussed going to their private swinger's party tomorrow night. Unless Gavin has his kid tomorrow night, we're on. I'm actually on the fence about wanting to go. It was fun and way hot, but like I mentioned earlier I don't know if it's something I'm ready to do again with other girls. We have each crawled into our own beds in our houses tonight and I am about to totally fall out at 10pm on a Friday night. Grandma Jules is signing off for the night...XO.

Friday, July 22, 2011

Place Your Bets

I sure wish I had a magic mirror right now.  This is the first weekend Coach has his boys and I’ll be in town with my kids at the same time.  I’d love to foresee the future and know if Sunday evening I’ll be pleasantly pleased or an angry wench. 

Since he did a craptastic job of keeping in touch via phone/text while I was at the beach and he had his boys, I’m feeling less than enthusiastic about how things will go this weekend.  Plus since I’m in town, if there’s no face-to-face interaction Miranda’s going to have to take the gloves off and give him a big smack down. 

I was cool with keeping things on the down low leading up to the court/visitation stuff but now that it’s all down and on paper there’s not a reason in the world that we can’t do stuff all together.  I’m not expecting nor do I want a full on Brady Bunch weekend but it’d be nice to at least all have dinner together or go swimming or something.

Keep your fingers crossed!


Season of Love

On Wednesday at 2:45PM EST (8:45am HI time) I received the following text from McDreamy - "I think I'm in love."

I knew this was coming. I consulted with Miranda as to how to respond and I went with "I think I am too."  He then said, "Nooo don't be a copycat." And that was the extent of the text conversation.

I called him and the vibe I got was that he was a little nervous and sort of embarrassed about it and wasn't ready to actually say it in person or elaborate. We started talking about baseball and his favorite team (the Phillies) and I was telling him how I've seen a bunch of Phillies bumper stickers around here lately. He said, "Yeah lots of people want to get on the bandwagon now." I said, "Well I'm glad I got on the bandwagon early while there was still room." Then he said, "It's ok for you to get on the bandwagon because you have a real reason. When people ask you why you like the Phillies you just say it's because the love of my life likes them."

Engaged by December and pregnant by the end of 2012. This is my prediction folks. Crazy? Maybe. I guess we will just have to wait and see!!!

47 days!!!!!


Thursday, July 21, 2011


I think I may be pushing Russell's buttons right now. He's been tense with me this week after walking in on Gavin and I Sunday night. I haven't really been at home much, but when I have he's avoided me in his room. Monday night, he was almost chatty via text but I think I made a choice last night that returned the awkwardness somewhat. 
Gavin called me yesterday and asked if he could spend the night. He's very in tune with our comings and goings these days. He had heard Russell mention that he might spend Tuesday night at his bf's, so he thought it would be safe. As it turned out Russell was home, but was in his room (sleeping?) when I got home at 7:30pm. Gavin came over around 8:30 and we hung out watching parts of movies b/c we couldn't settle on one. I was doing homework and he was teasing me on the couch until I made him stop, reminding him of being caught Sunday night. He asked me if I thought I wanted to hang out this weekend and maybe go over to the private party we were invited to last weekend. I told him I didn't know because he didn't seem overly into the idea after the fact and he said he was definitely interested regardless of whether or not he fucked anyone but me. He said watching me was soooo hot and he was wanting to have fun this weekend since Chloe comes back next week.  We'll see...I don't know that I'm so into licking more kitty this soon, but I love how turned on it made him. 
Gavin and I moved things into my room and played around for hours. He was making me cum soooo hard and sooo much that I totally lost track of time. We were also working hard to be super quiet to not get caught again! Finally at 1:30am, I dozed off for about 30 minutes and woke up at 2am to Gavin rubbing on my kitty again. He got me off so many more times it was ridiculous and then I dozed off some more until about 3am when he woke me up by being on top of me and rubbing his hard cock in between my legs. I woke up enough to have a super hot fuck and then rolled over to sleep until about 6:30am. I'm exhausted today, but I swear it was worth it. God he was hot last night and for once I didn't mind him sleeping in my bed and touching me as I slept. (No, still not in love with him...just nice to cuddle with him for a little while...don't read into it.)
I texted Russell something this morning and got back an "Ok, did Gavin sleep over last night?" text. I replied that he had because he's having roommate drama (not untrue) at home and wanted to get away. All other texts have been one worded replies and/or ignored. What I wanted to reply was "Where do you think he is since his truck is there and my door is closed??" I'm kinda whatever about it. Here's the thing...Gavin has slept over like 3 times other than when he lived with us for a few weeks and once we didn't have sex because both of our kids were there and it just wasn't the time. If you remember Bob, Russell's straight (yeah right) bf that basically lived with us for months on the weekends until he freaked out over being not straight and is now engaged, he slept in Russell's bed for months on end with Chloe in the house. Chloe's not home and I don't feel guilty and/or the need to apologize for last night. I did apologize for him walking in on us Sunday night, as I would have apologized to anyone in that case, but Gavin and I were very appropriate in our inappropriate behavior last night. Russell's current bf is moving out of state in the next month, so I suspect that's playing into a bunch of his feelings right now too.

Gavin called me around lunchtime to tell me that Russell had cornered him in the kitchen this morning and told him that catching us Sunday night wasn't cool. He told Gavin that's the 3rd time (really?? keep count much?) and that if Gavin respected him, it wouldn't happen again. Oddly, he's yet to bring it up with me. Miranda said she thinks it's a male pride issue...maybe so, but I'd be surprised if he didn't bring it up at some point. Gavin and I agreed that henceforth all sexual acts will take place in my bedroom behind closed doors when Russell is home. It's unrealistic to say that there will be no sexual acts when he's home b/c he's home a lot these days and we're very sexual beings. While I like that Gavin lives with his gf, it would be nice to have another place to go sometimes too.

 So, I wrote all of this post at work today and on the way home from school, Gavin calls me to invite me over. I would have said "yes" had I not been utterly exhausted from last night and if they didn't live with her bff. I told him that just seems like a horrible idea to invite me there given who their roommates are and the fact that her suspicions are up about him and I fucking right now anyway. 

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

TMI Tuesday - Regrets

What was the last thing you regret buying?
My house. -Gwyn
I'm pondering this and I would have to say I've got nothing. I rarely have buyer's remorse b/c I think about things before I buy them now in a way I haven't before due to very limited space in my houses in HI. I used to impulse shop all the time, but now I only buy it if I love it. - Jules
Hmmm. Buying into the belief that I wanted to be a career woman? - Miranda

What was the last sex toy you regret buying?
I don't own any sex toys. -Gwyn
The Japanese nipple clamps...holy fuck they almost made me cry and not in a good way! - Jules
A vibrating cock ring. Way underwhelmed by it. But then again it was like $5 and I made Coach pay for it. - Miranda

Briefly describe a time when you had sex and you shouldn't have. Why did you do it?
I slept with a friend's boyfriend one time back in college (The Inmate). We all went out to a bar. She got shitfaced wasted and passed out on the bathroom floor and I remember her lying in a puddle of milk that some random had told her to drink to sober up and/or vomit. I left with her bf and a friend of his. I honestly don't remember how it happened but we ended up having sex (it was my first time to top it all off) in a motel room. Really regret that one - and for the record that's the one and ONLY time I've ever slept with a friend's boyfriend. -Gwyn
Clark...I should have never, ever let him back into my life last spring after getting rid of him the previous fall. You all warned me and you were right. I did it because I totally allowed him to mind fuck me and I thought he was in love with me (yes, feel free to laugh...I just did). - Jules
There have been lots of times that I've had sex that I shouldn't have. But I rarely regret my sexual escapades because I learn something from them. That being said, there are three from the last year that just weren't worth it. - SoCo's friend who told me I looked sexy in my glasses because he made things awkward with me and SoCo's crowd of friends plus now I worry about Coach finding out about that slutty behavior, Cabana Boy because he fucking gave me chlamydia and pestered me for months and months, and ultimately FJB because I think if I hadn't slept with him, it would have been a whole lot easier to get over him. - Miranda

If you could choose to stay a certain age forever, what age would it be?
Minus the boyfriend I had at the time, I liked 28. But since I'm turning 31 in Hawaii then maybe I should go with 31 for my final answer! -Gwyn
I'm currently loving 35, but who knows? As I've said, I'm very present focused without much thought toward my past. - Jules
I've enjoyed my 30s really.  It's just a different level of acceptance with yourself and kind of not giving a crap what everyone else thinks. If I had to choose I'd say 34 though. That was a good year despite the divorce drama. - Miranda

A good friend's significant other flirts with you, would you tell your good friend?
No. I learned a long time ago that your girlfriends don't want to know what their boyfriends/husbands/fwb are doing behind their back. They either already know and don't care (but are embarrassed to admit that) or they would rather live in denial. Telling them usually ends in them being mad at you for telling and rarely if ever do they even believe you. -Gwyn
What she said...you know if he's a douche or not without me telling you. - Jules
I wouldn't tell but if I felt the flirting was toeing the line of being totally sketchy and not just good natured, I might try to subconsciously plant a few hints about his level of douchery in her mind. - Miranda

What is your greatest professional regret (exs: promotions you did not accept, internship opportunities you did not pursue, inventions/ideas you did not share)?
I regret becoming a professional. -Gwyn
I regret that I dropped a kid off my caseload after he threatened me. I was still fairly new in the field and this inner city kid sitting in detention told me to watch myself when he got out and it freaked me out. I've never, ever quit a client before and at the time I was doing what I thought was best for my personal safety (which does need to come first), but in hindsight I ended up doing to that kid what everyone else had always done to him. I did hook him up with an amazing male worker though, so I guess it worked out well in the end. - Jules
Ditto to Gwyn. I would say I regret entering the world of the office professional.  If I had to do it all over and I couldn't choose to be a kept woman I'd be a labor and delivery nurse. I'd still be a "professional" but at least I wouldn't be trapped at a damn desk all day with a bunch of immature women who either bitch/moan/weep that you aren't their BFF or slack to the maximum. And yes, I know I'm more than a little disillusioned with the working world right now. - Miranda

BONUS: What is your biggest regret?
I don't have too many regrets so this is tough....sometimes I wish I would've accepted one of the scholarships I was offered to play soccer in college. Maybe now I'd be a soccer coach instead of a miserable office drone and I'd have stayed in shape and not had the hideous Freshman year where I looked like the marshmallow woman. -Gwyn 
I don't really have a lot to say on this because I think everything happens for a reason, so why regret it? I guess the story above is one of my biggest regrets. I regret some other things too I suppose like not being more vocal about my Dad's addictions or not spending enough time with Chloe or not getting a useful degree in college that could have actually provided me with a decent salary in life...lol. I've come to realize that I do not regret my marriage at all. I married my best friend and we had a few really great years together as a married couple where we traveled the world and produced a fabulous, amazing, and awesome little girl. - Jules
Like Jules I don't regret a lot ultimately because I think people and things happen in your life for a reason. You live and learn.  That being said, the only regret I know of for sure that I'd absolutely 100% change is (and my apologies for being a downer here) is not going to my Dad's house and taking his gun when he had his breakdown a few days before he killed himself. My sister and I talked about it and decided it was ok to leave it there.  I know it wouldn't have changed things in the end most likely but still...  - Miranda

Monday, July 18, 2011

Busted...Damn It

Gavin called me tonight and asked to come over and hang out. He'd asked earlier about dinner, but since he's a meat and potatoes guy and I'm now a vegetarian/pescetarian, he was not interested in what I was cooking. He noted Russell was home, but decided to come anyway and watch a movie with me on the couch. During the movie, we smoked and had some wine and then he reached over and pulled my shorts over to start licking me...and then Russell walked out to pee...awkwardness ensued.

I know he caught this one because he frowned at me and motioned for Gavin to get off of me. Damn it...clearly my judgement was lacking, but that's not an excuse...I need to learn better judgement and boundaries. Just not tonight... ;)

After an appropriate amount of time passed (and my movie ended), I met Gavin in my room for some fabulous, quiet, muffled sex. I licked him to get him hard again and then he commanded me to sit on his cock. We fucked like we did the other night where he let me ride him forever and then he stood me up and kept fucking me in a lovely bent over, standing position. He kept prolonging his orgasm and pulling out and/or stopping to keep going. Finally, I was ready for him to cum so I let him stop and I kept squeezing him until very loud sighs emerged from him and he came soooo hard.

I'll keep ya'll posted on what my consequences are for my actions. I did apologize (and I meant it), so I'm hoping that counts for something and Russell isn't too pissed about walking into the living room and seeing Gavin with his tongue in my kitty. Bad kitty, Bad puppy!

PS After seeing Owen Wilson in Hall Pass tonight, I'd like to recant my claims that my "Owen" looks like him. He mildly resembles him, but my "Owen"  is  soooooo much sexier, definitely more fit, and way more tan!!

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Virgin No More

Jules is no longer a virgin...with girls. Gavin and I went to another swinger's party last night. We were kinda off our game and oddly not feeling overly sexual when we got there. I'd blown him earlier in the day and we'd been hanging out drinking and smoking all day. I was totally wiped out yesterday and actually didn't even leave the house until we left to the go to the party. We get to the party and the sheriff guy was being really weird. There were a lot of fat people there and that was grossing us out (sorry if you're large...we're not into watching you fuck), but there were some hotties too. I thought this one guy was smoking hot, but about an hour into the party he and his gf came out on the balcony where Gavin and I were hanging out and started having a crazy fight, so thankfully we avoided that drama. There was another girl that I thought Gavin would totally be into, but he wasn't.

Then this hot older couple came out who were probably mid 40s. They were telling us how this was their first party but that they had been in "the lifestyle" for years. She was pretty and he was attractive and I could tell that there was a connection. We were flirting and hanging out and then another couple showed up that they are planning to hook up with next weekend privately through some website they are on. The pretty older woman herded the couple out to us and said "I know you guys will all hit it off too". We did and the girl immediately came over to my side and totally invaded my personal space, but in a good way. We talked for a while and moved back in forth from inside to outside the hotel suite b/c the sheriff kept waving around a "Quiet Please" sign. It was soooo weird and also very funny, which only made us louder.

At one point in the kitchen, I had my first girl kiss. She just got in my face and moved in, tongue and all. Gavin was loving it, as was her husband and the other couple. Incidentally, I still had all of my clothes on b/c as I mentioned Gavin and I had not been feeling the vibe until these couples showed up. I could tell he thought they were hot and I love that we didn't even have to talk about this next part, we just did it.

The older couple told us that they had a room right down the hall and asked us if we wanted to leave and go to their room. We agreed and headed down there. We walked in and immediately took off everything but our bras and panties and they guys stripped down to their jeans and shorts. The younger of the girls came over to me and pulled my bra down and started sucking my nipples. I love that, apparently regardless of gender. We were rubbing each other and kissing and took it over to the bed. She laid me down and worked her way down from my tits to my kitty. She started licking and fingering me and I was totally cumming. Gavin was standing behind her watching and that was also super hot and making me very excited and wet. He came over to me after watching a few of my orgasms and asked me to start blowing him. Her husband was on the other side of the bed taking pictures (which he promised didn't include my face, but I'd bet they did). After I'd cum a lot, he was talking about how much he wanted to fuck me when she finished. The other couple was laying beside us going at it already.

He comes over and gets on top of me and starts fucking the holy hell out of me. I mean like hard core fucking.  I totally squirted all over him (as I did every time he fucked me last night) and he kept going and going. It was awesome!!! Meanwhile, the other couple continued to fuck and then the younger girl started blowing Gavin and I watched him cum all over her face. At one point, I'd actually thought it might be awkward for me to watch him fuck someone else in front of me, but it wasn't. It was fun filled with lots of sharing and participation all around. As the night moved on, I was fucking the younger girl's husband again and she and Gavin were engaged in some 69 and fucking and the older woman came over and sat on my face totally out of the blue. It completely shocked me, but I went with it and started kissing and licking her. The guy finished fucking me and as he finished his wife was blowing Gavin again and this time he came all over her tits. Both of the other women had fake tits, which were strange to play with too (in addition to those being the first ones I've ever played with). Anyway, he came and her husband told me to lick it off her tits and clean her up. I complied and started kissing her again after.

We switched again and this time I was blowing and fucking the older guy from the other couple and his wife was fucking around with Gavin while the younger girl was fucking her husband. I swear the night was a blur of different sexual experiences. We all 6 fucked around with each other at one point during the evening. This portion of the evening ended with Gavin and the younger husband standing on the bed against the headboard while all three girls shared sucking their cocks. The closet beside the bed had mirrored doors and so at various points in the evening, it was hot to look over and watch it all happening. The men came and we decided to get dressed and all go out to a bar since we were out of beer.

I went into the bathroom to get dressed and cleaned up and when I came back out, the younger girl came over to me again and started kissing me against the dresser. She quickly got onto her knees and Gavin pulled my panties over for her to go down on me some more. That girl freaking loved my kitty...omg. She licked and fingered me as everyone watched and her husband took more pictures (the picture thing was a little weird until I saw some of them and they were very sexy, so I relaxed on it...I'm never running for office anyway.) I came again and then I took her over to the bed at the men's urging and licked and finger fucked her as Gavin fucked me from behind and she blew her husband. The other couple started fucking again and after she came for me, Gavin pulled me over to the edge of the bed facing him to suck him off again.

Everyone got dressed and we actually left the room this time and headed down to a club Gavin knew about. We got there and he pulled me over to the dance floor. Gavin is actually a really good dancer and we were having so much fun drinking and hanging out. We went and all sat in this big booth, talking, drinking, and playing around with the guys (in an appropriate way since we were in public). The girls and Gavin and I kept dancing and having a good time and at one point all the girls were kissing each other again in the booth until we realized the whole club was like watching us and then we pulled back. Gavin and I finally left the group and went to play darts (I won, by the way...both games.). One of the couples invited us to stay in their room, but we decided to head home around 3am. On the way, Gavin got pulled over for doing 80 in a 55. He swore he was doing 65, but the laser seemed to say different.

At home, we came in and smoked some more weed and I blew him a little more, but he couldn't cum again after 4 or 5 orgasms in one day. I've lifted the no smoking ban with him since he's been cool the last few times. He told me that he had a really fun time, but said he likes watching me more at these things than fucking other women there. I said I noticed that he was mostly just getting blow jobs from them and just a little fucking. I thought he would be stoked that there were finally women at one that he wanted to fuck, but he said he's happy with what he has right now, despite being given the opportunity for more. On that note, he headed home and I crashed into my bed at 4:30am. What a night!!! They invited us over next weekend to the private party, so stay tuned to see if there's a sequel to this one.

Saturday, July 16, 2011

Karmic Payback Plus 50 million Orgasms

It has to come, I'm waiting for it. I know it will catch up with me, but as I've said before I think whatever it is will still make all this fun worth it. (Ok, well maybe I shouldn't thumb my nose at the karma gods...) I swear to all that is holy, I'm loving my life at the moment (sexually).

Owen started blowing my phone up yesterday afternoon. It started with a simple "So horny..." text to which I replied "Then let's fuck!". I was teasing regarding right then because I was on the way out the door to meet a girlfriend for dinner. I told him I'd sent him the video that Myli posted on her blog ( http://asiangirlheartswhiteboys.blogspot.com/) and suggested he watch it...ASAP. Then he sent me a video of him. 

He watched the one I sent him last night and sent me some super steamy texts afterwards. We sexted through us cumming and then fell asleep. It's funny how phone sex has now evolved into text sex. We could never have phone sex while he's at home, but text sex...yes, we can!

I woke up at 8am this morning to him texting me again to see if I could meet him right then for sex before work instead of trying to see if this afternoon worked. I told him Russell was leaving in a few minutes and that my house would be free, but I was just waking up. He said he didn't care if I was all made up, he just wanted to see me!

Russell left about 15 minutes later and Owen came over for a 30 minute "quickie". He came in and I laid myself flat on the bed for him. He grabbed my legs and pulled me over to the edge and pulled my legs up around his shoulders and laid over them so that we could see each other...mmmmm, so hot. He fucked me through several orgasms and then told me to get on my knees. He fucked me backwards like this one portion of the video I'd sent him that I mentioned was hot and then he turned around to give it to me in my favorite position. I came soooooo hard, so many times. If that isn't the way to start your day off right, I don't know what is! He reached into my toy box and pulled out one of my giant vibes and took his cock out of me and replaced it with that toy and then he put himself into my ass. He pounded me until I was screaming and soaked in my own cum and then he told me to roll over and suck his cum off.

We were laying there and he was petting my hair as I laid my head on his stomach in that after sex bliss and then he remembered he had to be at work and jumped up with a "oh shit" moment of being late. Fortunately he realized I set my clock 10 minutes fast and we showered and he headed to work.

Gavin called me while I was still in the shower and left a super sexy voice mail. I love his voice when he just wakes up. He's got a really deep sexy voice anyway, but first thing in the morning or really late at night it's extra deep and sexy. He told me that he's coming over around lunch time to work under my hood and that he really wants to go the swinger's party tonight after he finishes. His gf leaves the island this morning for 3 weeks, so I guess play time is on!

PS Hilarious side note...Russell is diving today with a guy that we had a threesome with a few years ago. Russell's phone remembered him, but the guy hadn't connected the dots yet. I can't wait to hear how that conversation went.

Friday, July 15, 2011

There's a Thin Line...

...between a secret admirer and a stalker, and the Chinless Wonder has officially crossed that line.

If you link back to my original post on this guy you will see that he has been trying to get me to go out with him, often under the guise of 'just as friends', for a good 6-8 months. In fact, Miranda and I also established that he tried to talk to me on POF (before he ever worked here) and I suggested the possibility of him getting a job at my workplace for no other reason than to insert himself in my life. It sounded like a crazy notion at the time but now I'm not so sure I was wrong.

Well, I've been deflecting his advances steadily from the start. He's asked me to dinner, rollerblading, movies, lunch, walk in the park...he kept trying to convince me that he doesn't have any "active friends" and he just wants somebody to do "active things" with. Most of the time I would gently put him off and tell him I'd think about it or tell him I was too busy this week maybe another time. Normally, this is not my style - I don't beat around the bush or spare feelings and I will tell a guy straight up if I'm not interested. But this particular situation was made more complicated by the fact that Chinless Wonder is the IT guy at my job. As any of you who use a computer at work know, having an 'in' with the IT department can make your life so much simpler, especially when you work for a nonprofit on an old ass computer in a building with crappy internet connection and your job involves sitting at your desk researching and writing on the computer 8 hours a day every day and you often use your work computer for non-work related activities such as blogging and shopping.....you get the point.

About a 3 weeks ago, he started up again asking me to go rollerblading. I guess I was just beat down that particular day (or was trying to get him to stop nagging me every 5 seconds about it) and I told him that I would consider going with him when I returned from my beach trip the following weekend. I also specifically stated that if I said yes it would be strictly as friends to which he replied "Who said I wanted anything more than friends?" Yeah, sure. Like you can't find anyone else in the entire world to go rollerblading with. Give me a break. Anyways, I digress. So I left it at that and headed off to the beach with my girls. That was Thursday.

On the following Sunday morning, I was at the beach sitting on my friend's porch drinking coffee and trying to remember why I thought 5 margaritas, 2 shots and 2 vodka drinks was a good idea the night before going out on a boat in the 105 degree weather. I got on Facebook on my phone and saw I had 2 messages in my inbox. I opened it up and saw they were both from Chinless Wonder. The first read, "Got tan titties yet?" and the next (sent 1 minute later) read, "Yes I just said that lol ;)". They were sent at about 10:30pm the night before. It took me all of 2 seconds to decide how to handle it and with that he was un-friended and blocked entirely from my profile on FB.

I texted Miranda to get her take on the situation and she agreed that I was correct in feeling offended and that is was completely inappropriate for him to talk to me like that. Chinless Wonder had made a few other mildly inappropriate comments on some of my FB statuses that I tried to dismiss as harmless but after the tittie comment I had to draw the line.

I got back to work the following week and the first day I was back I got an IM from Chinless Wonder that said "Rollerblade ;)". I ignored it. We have an internal IM system at work that I am automatically logged into (that has since been fixed lol) so that gave him another avenue to communicate with me. After ignoring a few more IMs I hoped he would get the picture and leave me alone. Apparently stalkers aren't good at taking hints.

The Friday before July 4th I was in the office by myself. I work in a building across the street from Chinless Wonder and he can see when my car is the only one in the parking lot in front of my building. I was busy typing away and next thing I know he is standing in the doorway of my office. I instantly felt uncomfortable. He said "So, how was the beach? Did you have fun?" I didn't take my eyes off my computer screen and muttered "Yes, it was nice" and continued doing what I was doing. He stood there for another few seconds and then told me that he was going to the beach the week of the 4th and how he couldn't find anyone to go with him blah blah blah blah you're a crazy stalker blah blah. I didn't respond at all and didn't look at him and after about 3-4 minutes he left. I couldn't believe that he 1) had the balls to try to talk to me after he knew I blocked him on FB and was ignoring his IMs and 2) that of all the things to bring up he asks me about the very beach trip that he so rudely interrupted with his titty comment. I guess he hoped I'd say something about his message and he could explain how it was just a joke but he's got the wrong girl. After he left I decided I had to take some more serious action to deter his behavior because it was starting to freak me out.

I went and talked to my boss about it, which was one of the funniest conversations we've ever had, and he told me he would talk to our VP of Operations (a woman) because she would know how best to handle the situation. Two days ago I got an email from the VP asking me to come to her office so we could talk. I went and she asked me to tell her the whole Chinless Wonder saga. Again, one of the funniest and most awkward work conversations I've ever had. The VP is old enough to be my mother and looked confused when I was trying to explain FB messaging and un-friending and all the intricacies of online communication. She even said "Well we haven't had to deal with this in so long because everyone here is much older than you. This is a good lesson in how social media is changing workplace dynamics." Hahaha glad I can be your guinea pig lady now tell me how to get this creeper off my back!!!! I told her that I didn't want to get Chinless Wonder in trouble that I just felt uncomfortable around him now and that I felt like I needed to tell someone what was going on. I also told her that I didn't want to have to interact with him unless absolutely necessary because I didn't want him to have the opportunity to say something else inappropriate. And in the spirit of honesty, if I got him in trouble he could ruin my life by exposing how much non-work related activity takes place on my work computer! The VP told me she would have an off the record conversation with him and that if anything else happened to let her know and she would have to approach it in a more serious, on the record manner.

That afternoon I got an email from Chinless Wonder with the subject line "My overstepping boundaries" and the email read, "I apologize for any confusion on my part between professional and friendship. I completely understand your dilemma, and I will continue to provide the best service I can for your IT needs and keep it 100% professional." I can't tell you how hard I laughed over the fact that he gave the email a subject line - IT nerds are so predictable. I didn't respond to the email and I don't plan to. I'm hoping this is the end of it. He messaged Miranda on FB a few times that evening but I'll have to let her fill you in on that hilarity or else this post will be 6 pages long.

Who wants to place a bet on how long before Chinless Wonder decides to move to Hawaii?


Burning the Candle at Both Ends

Monday coming back from the beach, I was planning my week out in my head and because I was in vacation mode, I totally didn’t think about anything that I had actually planned to do. 

So my dream Monday thoughts were, “Oh I’m going to have three nights of just coming home, one night of bartending, then Coach will hopefully be home and I’ll have a nice relaxing weekend.”

Fast forward to reality and this is what Miranda’s week has been like.

Monday – Home from beach, furious cleaning, and then taking care of Coach with his back injury.
Tuesday – Work (Gross), Gym, taking care of Coach
Wednesday – Gym, Work (Still Gross), Wine Wednesday dinner with the girls, sex with Coach (Yah!)
Thursday – Work (Absolutely disgusting), bartending at work concert, home falling asleep to avoid Coach who’s hopped up on prednisone and grouchy
Friday – Gym, Work (I mean really does the madness ever end), helping Gwyn get ready for the Hawaii yard sale, movie with previously grouchy Coach who seems to be coming down from the roid rage.
Saturday – Hawaii yard sale with Gwyn and one of my favorite girls, lunch with girls, Gym, home for approximately 2 hours, then cookout with friends, and night out on town with other friends.
Sunday – A serious coma is planned at the pool and a visit to the gym if I’m not completely comatose.

Shew!  It’s been a while since I’ve had a week like this and I can feel it!  Outside of sleeping, I bet I haven’t been home and awake for more than 2 hours any given day this week!  On the upside last night when I was bartending I made almost $90 in tips.  When it comes to old men, Miranda is one hot commodity.  I wore my cowboy hat (see the HNT from a couple weeks ago) a few weeks ago it made them literally insane. 

I miss going home to my quiet apartment!  I’ve enjoyed the extra (non-roid rage) time I’ve had with Coach this week but I’m admittedly yearning for a little alone time at home.  Guess I’ll just have to hold out for Sunday night when he goes back to DC.

It makes me laugh to think that I ran like this all of last summer and fall and I couldn’t hardly stay at home ever.  Gwyn actually lectured me and forced me to learn to spend time at home lol.  My how things have changed…