Monday, December 17, 2012

Too Close for Comfort

In the last week small town life at it’s finest has nearly bitten me in my ass.  Early in the week Peabody, I and a couple friends were at their favorite place to eat in town. Now pre-Peabody I avoided this place like the plague because Coach always said all the girls who used to hate on me went there all the time. However since Peabody, we’ve been there quite a number of times and I’ve never even seen anyone in there I knew. Imagine that, Coach lying…

I digress, so we are in there eating dinner and having a good time.  This place is set up with bar seating only and the bar is this long curvy thing that winds in and out all around the place.  Across the bar from me a movement caught my eye and I glanced that way to see who was sitting down and it was…. Coach’s ex-wife. HA!  I wasn’t sure if she knew who I was or not and clearly since the whole break up debacle she and I have had no bad blood but it was still hella awkward.

I nugdged Peabody and filled him it and he said she kept looking at me like she was trying to figure out who I was.  I did my best to avoid making eye contact with her the rest of the time because it was just weird.

So then Saturday night we are at a Christmas party at a friends house in the next town over.  We are having a good time and socializing. I met a few people who know Peabody who I haven’t met before (and just like all the rest in the beginning they couldn’t sing his praises high enough) and this guy comes in who works at the aforementioned restaurant.

We were talking to him and he said he’d invited a friend of his to the party and next thing I know in walks SoCo of all people! Talk about a blast from the past.  For those who haven’t been on this whole journey with us, SoCo was a guy I had a nearly successful FWB relationship with before I met Coach. Then he started dating Coach’s sister about the same time Coach and I started dating. It was awkward and funny then and it was awkward and funny again Saturday night.

I haven’t seen SoCo in forever so we both were surprised and laughed and I had to explain to Peabody who SoCo was; well I left out the whole FWB part lol. Damn living in a small town can be nuts!

Otherwise there’s not a whole lot to tell. Peabody is hoping to go with me to Hawaii in February and I would so love for him to so the girls can meet him.  We are still getting along great and he’s opening up to me more and more from an emotional standpoint. Despite my initial craziness from it, I’m actually really glad we’ve taken things slow from that standpoint.  I just absolutely adore this man and I sure hope he feels the same way about me!


Wednesday, December 5, 2012

Baby Boom

So Sunday I found out my brother and his wife are expecting their first kid.  They’ve apparently been trying for quite a while and though they had a rough patch earlier this year, things are apparently on the up and up with them. 

My mom is over the moon. It’s been a good while since we had a baby in the family and quite honestly I think we were all starting to wonder if they were ever going to have kids.  It’s nice though because this is the first big happy family thing that has affected all of us since my dad passed away.  I digress though…

After they told me I met them at my mom’s house for a little family celebration time.  I queried if they’d told Duckie and the kids and they hadn’t so I called them up and put them on speaker phone.  I told them “we” had some special news for them and to turn their phone on speaker. They did and my sister in law started talking (without introducing herself) and said “I’m having a baby!”

There was a moment of dead silence then a choked sputtering and “what???” from Duckie.  We sat there in silence for a moment and then I died laughing because I realized Duckie thought I was the one saying I was pregnant! HA! 

Through my peals of laughter I clarified the situation but I’m pretty sure Duckie had a mini stroke from it.  It was a freaking hilarious way to cap off my Sunday!  


PS - Seriously, this is the third person I'm close to that's having a baby now.  If I ever worried about having an itch to have another baby I'm pretty damn sure I'm done because these ovaries aren't feeling anything even in the midst of this baby boom!

Monday, December 3, 2012

Merry Miranda

I feel bad because we are all neglecting the blog so much but I guess that’s what happens when you actually start LIVING life and being happy.  I find it incredibly humorous that all three of us are incredibly happy dating guys we almost passed up for one reason or another. I keep thinking how funny little decisions like that can change your life so dramatically.

Today as I was killing time at work I saw this advice and it made me think about my past dating habits – “Every online profile, every random dater, every TV single person all say they want the same thing in a mate: a sense of humor. From men and women. But the pressure to be funny, when mixed with a healthy dose of nerves, means that conversations easily veer into banter. But banter often flips directly into sarcasm and making jokes at your date's expense. Whatever happened to sincerity? Sincerity is wonderful. Sincerity is milk chocolate; sarcasm is a grapefruit. In the past, I was deeply in love with a woman who never tried to make jokes. Not that she never laughed (I still miss her laugh), but she just didn't feel the need to be constantly funny. And neither did I. Love doesn't always need a laugh track.”

I know in the past I’ve definitely toed the line of too much sarcasm on occasion, especially when I’ve felt insecure.  After my grounding the first part of this year I felt a lot of those defenses drop down and I’m not nearly as sarcastic with anyone – friends, family, boys – as I used to be.  And a lot of the time I think I was using humor to be entertaining because I simply wasn’t comfortable just being myself.  It’s nice to have all those things feel so different now.

And speaking of things feeling different…. I’m an avid reader. I love it. I’m probably one of the few adults who still has a library card and they regularly use it (shout out to Josie my other library loving sister – Whoop!). So I’m reading this book called The Island by Elin Hilderbrand. It’s basically about a family of women who are all single for one reason or another and the mother of the group has been divorced for about two years and has recently fallen in love again.  The women go on vacation for a month to this island and it’s essentially cut off from the rest of the world; so much that there’s only one spot on the island that can get cell reception.  After a miserable week the mother breaks down and treks out to the point on the island with cell reception and calls her new man – Hank.  The call is less than satisfying.  This repeats for a few days and then she fesses up to one of her daughters and vents.  There’s a ring of truth here in my feelings during the first two months with Peabody.

“So here’s the thing I don’t understand, still, at my age.  In the two years between the time your father and I split and the time I met Hank, I was fine.  I was reasonably happy, I had hobbies and interests – my gardening, my reading, the house, you kids, my friends.  Then I met Hank. And he liked to do things – go out for dinner, go to the theater, spend the night in nice hotels, go dancing. God it was intoxicating to have someone to DO things with. You have no idea. I’d always been alone, throughout my marriage, alone, alone, alone. The problem is my happiness, now, depends on Hank.  It’s not fair that someone should be able to affect me this way! But I don’t want to go back to how things were before I met him. I was lonely. Then, with Hank, I was not lonely. And now, without Hank, I’m even lonelier than I was before.”

In the first couple months with Peabody I was definitely struggling a bit. I have always been one to throw myself into a relationship so trying to take things slow and remember to not “lose myself” in the relationship was hard and anxiety producing.  But what the mom says above is still very true for me. It’s intoxicating to have someone to do things with.  For so long in my marriage it was just routine and boring and we had nothing to talk about or go do together that didn’t involve the kids.  Peabody has just blown those doors right off. We’ve done so much in the last four months its crazy.  Even with Coach, while we went out to bars, it was more about getting drunk and either having sex or fighting. There was little that we did, much less talked about. 

I think in the last month I’ve really settled into this relationship and being myself.  I think he has too.  We’ve both said this is a really different relationship from anything else we’ve experienced before.   The last week was amazing.  Peabody and I did so many fun different things from just hanging out and having dinner at this favorite place in town to discovering amazing new music that we both feel in love with to an impromptu dinner out of town with another couple that was incredibly fun and really set the tone for the holidays for me. 

I think this will definitely be a Christmas to remember!