OMG today was priceless. The kids were with Duckie at Sawyer’s son’s birthday party. Sawyer had invited me but like I was going to take the kids after the way his sorry ass has been lately. Whatever! Anyways Duckie told me he’d been planning on going regardless of if I went so I sent them off with him and planned to enjoy some alone time.
I stroll down to the pool a little after lunchtime and notice the ever present Cabana Boy is there and I quickly duck and take a chair several down from him and throw on my MP3 player fast enough I can credibly claim I didn’t notice he was at the pool. About this time SoCo starts texting me and I gamely mention I’m at the pool and there’s an empty chair next to me. At this point he tells me he’s been talking to Pool John and they are all headed to the pool in about 30 minutes. Greatttttt. This is not going to be awkward at all!
So then I’m texting with College Crush a bit later and Pool John and SoCo show up and they all heartily greet me and one another. I actually had told SoCo via text to sit with his friends, not with me. Just figured that’d make things a little easier on all of us. I’m just laying there working on my (by now) killer tan (thank you Hawaii!) and Cabana Boy jumps in the pool and swims down to the edge near where my chair is. He starts chatting me up and asking about Hawaii. As we talk, SoCo jumps in the pool and swims over LOL. They are both talking to me and I decide it’s weird to be out of the pool so I jumped in and the three of us chat for about 30 seconds. The first time something comes out of my mouth that reveals that SoCo and I have been talking privately, Cabana Boy immediately swims off! LMFAO!
After a bit more, we get out of the water and go back to our respective chairs. Now College Crush texts me and says oh, by the way he’s in town and wants to stop by! Screech! I have this awful image of College Crush sitting next to me at the pool while SoCo, Cabana Boy, and Pool John glower over my shoulder, and then Duckie walks in with the kids. Way too many guys I’ve slept with in one small area! I quickly told College Crush that the kids would be back anytime now but maybe he could come by this evening after they are in bed. Thankfully, he agreed to my plan.
So Duckie brings the kids back and drops them off at the pool. As he walks past my trio of “friends,” I almost literally LOL’d because they all were checking him out. As the afternoon progressed, any time Cabana Boy would try to talk to me for more than a minute, SoCo would show up and Cabana Boy would slink off. It was really cracking me up. Randomly, there was a girl who was flirting hardcore with SoCo, like hardcore pool flirting. I think they’re friends but she was putting off the serious signals. I was alternately feeling weirdly territorial (yeah I know its bullshit that I date all these guys and then don’t want them to date anyone but me) and weirdly mighty proud of SoCo for being nothing but friendly to her. It was weird to watch for sure.
Eventually he left and then Cabana Boy had me all to himself LOL. Cabana Boy told me he is dying for kids of his own (I immediately texted Gwyn and suggested I set them up LOL) and then he started playing with Ladybug. At one point he frantically motioned for me to come over to where they were and I heard Ladybug ask him, “Why were you in our apartment that night?” He was about white as a ghost! I started laughing and asked her to repeat her question then I told her he’d come up to meet our cat. LMFAO! Pool John, as he’s apt to do, grilled dinner for everyone including my kids and then I scooped up the kids and got the heck out of dodge. I should add that throughout the afternoon College Crush continued to text me and pretty much grill me on every guy at the pool. It was quite delightful. I think hearing that Pool John, despite his age and miniature stature, was cooking dinner for us and has done that quite a few times got College Crush’s hackles up a bit. Ha!
So I get Ladybug down to bed early (thank you swimming!) and me and Leo are hanging out. I get a text from College Crush that he’s going to be by sometime in the next hour so I encouraged Leo to go ahead and get into bed figuring he’d watch some TV and pass out quickly. I jumped in the shower and did a quick primping session and as I sat back down on the couch, Leo strolls out and says he needs a drink. Almost immediately, there’s a knock on the door. My thought, “Shit! He’s here and Leo’s up! Eeeekkkk!”
I figured I couldn't exactly ignore the fact that someone was knocking on the door or reach my phone quick enough to ask him to go away for another 30 minutes so I put on my big girl panties and gamely let him in and introduced the two of them. Thankfully in passing I’ve mentioned College Crush’s name a time or two as someone I text or talk to from college so he wasn’t totally unknown. Still I swear I saw Leo’s chest puff up a bit and his voice dropped an octave or two when he shook College Crush’s hand. Wisely College Crush chose to sit over on the love seat while I sat on the couch until Leo left the room.
So a little while later, we’re just watching a movie and talking and College Crush puts his arm around me. Wouldn’t you know it, two minutes later Leo comes back in the room. I’m sure my face froze in the “oh shit” mode before I answered Leo’s question and sent him back to his room. At this point I texted Gwyn an “Oh Fuck!” kind of message. I will say College Crush was smart enough to know not to try anything other than a quick kiss here or there until I was fully sure Leo was asleep. The first time I went back to check on him he was about halfway asleep and Leo asked me, “What’s that guy’s name again? When’s he going to leave?” SHITTTTTTT! I was hoping College Crush had made little if any impact. I told Leo his name and reminded him that I’ve known him since college. Told him he was just passing through town because his family lives here and I’d invited him over to watch a movie. I also very clearly told him that College Crush was leaving any minute now. FUUUUCKKKK! I hope he doesn’t ask any questions in the morning. I’m gonna need to come up with a good explanation about this one to satisfy his curiosity if he does.
So the kids are sleeping and thankfully College Crush has a lot more willpower than me and we kept it all very PG and he just left so that we wouldn’t have the awkwardness of trying to get him out of the apartment before the kids woke up in the morning or him having to explain to his parents where he’d stayed the night.
What an odd and hilarious day! I love when things feel uncomfortable funny and today was a way uncomfortable funny sort of day!