Note to Sawyer: Just Admit it Was A Booty Call Already...
WTF. Seriously. Last night I did my pimping rounds. Talked to Lawyer Boy and Motorcycle Man via phone, texted with College Crush, chatted with Texas (it’s getting out of control all these boys!). About 2 I was finally ready to crash and I was climbing into bed when the phone rang. Sawyer….
Apparently he’d been hanging out with his friends drinking a few and he decided to risk it and come see me. Considering my social life lately, he’s lucky I was home! LOL! I broke the cardinal rule and told him that even though I had the kids he could come over. I mean they were asleep in bed and I mean, come on, he’s not a stranger, and I know him. I also fucked with his head a little while we were talking. I said something to the effect of “gosh if you’re taking this big risk coming over here to see me, must mean that you really miss me.” He said “I do, I can’t stop thinking about you.”
At that point, I knew this would be trouble. So he got here a few minutes later and we hung out for a while. He was so trying to get me to say I was in love with him or some shite like that. He kept asking me how I felt and essentially begging me to “tell him how I really feel.” Not so sure I’d give the same answer I would have given a few weeks ago. I told him, no I wouldn’t say any of that stuff because those were the rules he laid down. He told me several times he had “fallin’ for me” and that he couldn’t stop thinking about me. Interesting because this week I had started the “pull away” maneuver from him and have not talked to him nearly as much or even asked when we’d get to see each other.
He said knowing about the other boys was making him crazy LOL. Again, he asks I don’t volunteer that info. He asked me if was sleeping with anyone else. Errrr, ummmm, hmmmm. I actually lied and said no. I mean I did sleep with Lawyer Boy the other night but we haven’t been together since then…. I asked him if it mattered if I was or not and he said it would make him jealous as hell. Hmmm, may have to remember that for the future. Could be a useful tool. Haha.
He actually stayed a lot longer than he should have. It was hot but with all that emotional volleying it was like walking through a minefield. Don’t know what to do about that but I’m keeping my emotions firmly in control with him. Curious that I went from being unfaithful to Duckie with Sawyer and now I’m technically being unfaithful to Sawyer. Hmmmmm.
I do feel a little whoreish lol. I mean I went out with Motorcycle Man Wednesday and we did some kissing (totally PG but still), then Lawyer Boy Thursday and well you know that was X-rated fun, then dancing Friday night where I actually kept my lips to myself for a change, and then had Sawyer over for more X-rated fun Saturday night. It’s a wee bit slutty and definitely not territory I’ve been in before. But it’s fun. I need to keep it in check though!
Miranda
Apparently he’d been hanging out with his friends drinking a few and he decided to risk it and come see me. Considering my social life lately, he’s lucky I was home! LOL! I broke the cardinal rule and told him that even though I had the kids he could come over. I mean they were asleep in bed and I mean, come on, he’s not a stranger, and I know him. I also fucked with his head a little while we were talking. I said something to the effect of “gosh if you’re taking this big risk coming over here to see me, must mean that you really miss me.” He said “I do, I can’t stop thinking about you.”
At that point, I knew this would be trouble. So he got here a few minutes later and we hung out for a while. He was so trying to get me to say I was in love with him or some shite like that. He kept asking me how I felt and essentially begging me to “tell him how I really feel.” Not so sure I’d give the same answer I would have given a few weeks ago. I told him, no I wouldn’t say any of that stuff because those were the rules he laid down. He told me several times he had “fallin’ for me” and that he couldn’t stop thinking about me. Interesting because this week I had started the “pull away” maneuver from him and have not talked to him nearly as much or even asked when we’d get to see each other.
He said knowing about the other boys was making him crazy LOL. Again, he asks I don’t volunteer that info. He asked me if was sleeping with anyone else. Errrr, ummmm, hmmmm. I actually lied and said no. I mean I did sleep with Lawyer Boy the other night but we haven’t been together since then…. I asked him if it mattered if I was or not and he said it would make him jealous as hell. Hmmm, may have to remember that for the future. Could be a useful tool. Haha.
He actually stayed a lot longer than he should have. It was hot but with all that emotional volleying it was like walking through a minefield. Don’t know what to do about that but I’m keeping my emotions firmly in control with him. Curious that I went from being unfaithful to Duckie with Sawyer and now I’m technically being unfaithful to Sawyer. Hmmmmm.
I do feel a little whoreish lol. I mean I went out with Motorcycle Man Wednesday and we did some kissing (totally PG but still), then Lawyer Boy Thursday and well you know that was X-rated fun, then dancing Friday night where I actually kept my lips to myself for a change, and then had Sawyer over for more X-rated fun Saturday night. It’s a wee bit slutty and definitely not territory I’ve been in before. But it’s fun. I need to keep it in check though!
Miranda
Ahhh, slutty is such a matter of opinion. Asshole is a matter of fact, slut is a matter of opinion :)
ReplyDeleteI'm new to this blog, so I don't want to be overly familiar, but it seems to me you're just about single again - you've been married and passionless for a long time, and now you've got your body to yourself again free and clear and guilt-free. I haven't read all the archive yet, but I don't THINK Sawyer has any designs on being your significant other (and I'm not sure that's really what you want right now anyways). Meeting new people and finding out what you've been missing certainly seems reasonable to me.
AMEN Diner Nighthawk! I think you just need to make a few cuts to the team (aka toe boy, possibly homosexual Texas boy and psycho date stalker) and it will all feel more manageable, and less slutty :)
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