You Can Take Your Body Wash and Shove It Up Your Ass Sawyer...
Email exchange with Sawyer today...
Sawyer: how are you working from home and not doing emails??
Miranda: Sorry. I was napping LOL. I'm on it now baby.
Sawyer: lazy ass
Miranda: LOL too much partying this weekend. What’s up with you today?
Sawyer: tired as hell.. how about my son was asked to play on an all-star soccer team already! he would be traveling and playing against 7-8 year olds.. i was shocked that he was picked. the coach asked me and talked to me about it last night and it is legit!!
Miranda: That is awesome! Nephew plays on an all-star baseball team. The traveling can be a lot but if your kid has the talent... Are you going to let him do it? FYI - You're welcome to come lay in bed with me and rest...
Sawyer: if he wants to do it, he can.. I would love to come over and "rest"!! but, i dont think that would happen, do you?
Miranda: I could lay here and just rest with you. I think. Well, maybe with a little kissing and cuddling. Of course that would probably lead to more.... but there'd definitely be rest after that LOL. Actually I totally think I could just lay here with you. It'd be hard, but I could do it if that was the challenge. I miss your face. I know I'm not supposed to say that but it's true.
Sawyer: Is that all you miss?
Miranda: Well I miss other parts too…
Sawyer: nice.. i have to make it over there this wee!!
Miranda: Come see me today
Sawyer: i cant baby.. i have some errands to run after work. i will try on fri though..
Miranda: Can’t I be an errand today? LOL I suppose Friday will work. Are you working Friday?
Sawyer: i do, but, i dont have to really be here until 745. if you want me to come over fri morning, i can
Miranda: I suppose that will work.
Sawyer: there’s one thing you will have to do though…
Miranda: What exactly is that?
Sawyer: buy me some old spice body wash for your place.. i cant come in here smelling like you know what..
Miranda: Are you freaking kidding me?
I mean seriously! Now this is a total turn around from how we normally talk. This conversation came about after yesterday I played it so well when he asked me if I was still seeing Motorcycle Man. Now I don’t volunteer any information about my dating life to him but occasionally he gets curious and asks. I responded to his question with the most perfect and true answer ever, “LOL Baby, I’m seeing lots of boys.” He never answered me back until this email exchange.
I had to forward this email exchange to my girl at work cause we’re like all up in each other’s business and have become total dating/boy gurus for each other. She cracked me up with the vehemence of her response though it was spot on…
Girl: Ok let me make this clear to you - you stop seeing him right this second. It is so obvious that all he is doing is getting an ego trip off of your attention, not saying he isn't into you but it's the attention and the praise that he is after. I can tell that by just reading these few emails. And I DONT LIKE IT ONE BIT!!!!!!!!!!!!
You tell him to buy his own god damn body wash and if he doesn't want to smell like you know what then maybe he shouldn't cheat on his wife and that would solve the problem.
Miranda: Yeah, I guess instead of going the gooey-gooey emotional route like last time he got jealous he's gone the uber-ass route. He's off his f'ing rocker if he thinks I'm gonna keep playing this game. I cannot believe he said that to me.
Girl: Yeah and he is making you be the one to suggest everything and then when you try to be innocent with it he makes you amp it up some....you tell him you miss him and he says all you miss is my face?...you ask him to come over and he turns it around and says he can come if you want him to..but when you first asked him to come over to rest and cuz you missed his face that wasn't enough....it wasn't until the other talk started that he started showing interest...and even then it was all about him, he said nothing to you. I’m telling you you've got to get away from him. God forbid he left his wife, you don't want to end up being the next her and you can trust me on that one.
This afternoon he actually called me which never happens. It’s one of our rules for not getting caught is to limit all phone contact to emergency situations. He asked me if that email had pissed me off and I told him hell yeah. He laughed and tried to make excuses and said he just gets jealous thinking about me with all these other boys. I reminded him he was the one who pushed me to date in the first place and that he couldn’t really say anything about it anyways what with being MARRIED and all. He said “I know. It’s just hard. Just don’t have sex with any of them.” I stuttered a “what????” and said it’s not like I didn’t think he was fucking his wife all this time. He said “I swear we haven’t had sex since October right before me and you started being together.” I just said whatever and that I had to go. The best part of this whole conversation, he was on the way to pick up his wife and take her to a job interview. Seriously, Sawyer is walking the finest line he’s ever walked with me.
It’s a hard relationship to navigate for sure. Much like Jules’ situation, he’s sort of one of my best friends in a weird fucked up way. We’ve spent an awful lot of time together, not just time in bed, but before I moved even just hanging out with the kids and stuff. My heart is definitely much more secure than it was 7 weeks ago as far as he goes so that’s good.
So you tell me, what should I do with him?
Sawyer: how are you working from home and not doing emails??
Miranda: Sorry. I was napping LOL. I'm on it now baby.
Sawyer: lazy ass
Miranda: LOL too much partying this weekend. What’s up with you today?
Sawyer: tired as hell.. how about my son was asked to play on an all-star soccer team already! he would be traveling and playing against 7-8 year olds.. i was shocked that he was picked. the coach asked me and talked to me about it last night and it is legit!!
Miranda: That is awesome! Nephew plays on an all-star baseball team. The traveling can be a lot but if your kid has the talent... Are you going to let him do it? FYI - You're welcome to come lay in bed with me and rest...
Sawyer: if he wants to do it, he can.. I would love to come over and "rest"!! but, i dont think that would happen, do you?
Miranda: I could lay here and just rest with you. I think. Well, maybe with a little kissing and cuddling. Of course that would probably lead to more.... but there'd definitely be rest after that LOL. Actually I totally think I could just lay here with you. It'd be hard, but I could do it if that was the challenge. I miss your face. I know I'm not supposed to say that but it's true.
Sawyer: Is that all you miss?
Miranda: Well I miss other parts too…
Sawyer: nice.. i have to make it over there this wee!!
Miranda: Come see me today
Sawyer: i cant baby.. i have some errands to run after work. i will try on fri though..
Miranda: Can’t I be an errand today? LOL I suppose Friday will work. Are you working Friday?
Sawyer: i do, but, i dont have to really be here until 745. if you want me to come over fri morning, i can
Miranda: I suppose that will work.
Sawyer: there’s one thing you will have to do though…
Miranda: What exactly is that?
Sawyer: buy me some old spice body wash for your place.. i cant come in here smelling like you know what..
Miranda: Are you freaking kidding me?
I mean seriously! Now this is a total turn around from how we normally talk. This conversation came about after yesterday I played it so well when he asked me if I was still seeing Motorcycle Man. Now I don’t volunteer any information about my dating life to him but occasionally he gets curious and asks. I responded to his question with the most perfect and true answer ever, “LOL Baby, I’m seeing lots of boys.” He never answered me back until this email exchange.
I had to forward this email exchange to my girl at work cause we’re like all up in each other’s business and have become total dating/boy gurus for each other. She cracked me up with the vehemence of her response though it was spot on…
Girl: Ok let me make this clear to you - you stop seeing him right this second. It is so obvious that all he is doing is getting an ego trip off of your attention, not saying he isn't into you but it's the attention and the praise that he is after. I can tell that by just reading these few emails. And I DONT LIKE IT ONE BIT!!!!!!!!!!!!
You tell him to buy his own god damn body wash and if he doesn't want to smell like you know what then maybe he shouldn't cheat on his wife and that would solve the problem.
Miranda: Yeah, I guess instead of going the gooey-gooey emotional route like last time he got jealous he's gone the uber-ass route. He's off his f'ing rocker if he thinks I'm gonna keep playing this game. I cannot believe he said that to me.
Girl: Yeah and he is making you be the one to suggest everything and then when you try to be innocent with it he makes you amp it up some....you tell him you miss him and he says all you miss is my face?...you ask him to come over and he turns it around and says he can come if you want him to..but when you first asked him to come over to rest and cuz you missed his face that wasn't enough....it wasn't until the other talk started that he started showing interest...and even then it was all about him, he said nothing to you. I’m telling you you've got to get away from him. God forbid he left his wife, you don't want to end up being the next her and you can trust me on that one.
This afternoon he actually called me which never happens. It’s one of our rules for not getting caught is to limit all phone contact to emergency situations. He asked me if that email had pissed me off and I told him hell yeah. He laughed and tried to make excuses and said he just gets jealous thinking about me with all these other boys. I reminded him he was the one who pushed me to date in the first place and that he couldn’t really say anything about it anyways what with being MARRIED and all. He said “I know. It’s just hard. Just don’t have sex with any of them.” I stuttered a “what????” and said it’s not like I didn’t think he was fucking his wife all this time. He said “I swear we haven’t had sex since October right before me and you started being together.” I just said whatever and that I had to go. The best part of this whole conversation, he was on the way to pick up his wife and take her to a job interview. Seriously, Sawyer is walking the finest line he’s ever walked with me.
It’s a hard relationship to navigate for sure. Much like Jules’ situation, he’s sort of one of my best friends in a weird fucked up way. We’ve spent an awful lot of time together, not just time in bed, but before I moved even just hanging out with the kids and stuff. My heart is definitely much more secure than it was 7 weeks ago as far as he goes so that’s good.
So you tell me, what should I do with him?
Guys can be weird in front of computers. Sometimes we just say whatever comes out, and then hit send to see how it sounded. We're not quite as adept at social interaction as women are, so we say a lot of stuff just to see if it was the right thing to say. He might be an ass, I don't know, or he might just be enjoying the facade a computer screen provides a little too much.
ReplyDeleteHowever, he does need to understand that you have a life outside of him, just as he does. In fact, he sounds like he's got a whole alter-ego outside of you.
Those emails I wrote make me seem like quite the bad ass. I might start wearing my sunglasses inside the office now - just so everybody knows how I roll. I stand by my opinion though...I think you should tell Sawyer to get LOST.
ReplyDeleteI agree with anon there- as much as you like Sawyer, it is often unhealthy to hold onto a relationship that you forged while in an unhappy or desperate situation. They are not the best thing for you. When you are feeling bad you don't reach for carrot sticks, you reach for ice cream- but you shouldn't indulge in ice cream all the time because it isn't nutritious and ultimately you need real food. Sawyer may be fun, and he gave you a rush that you needed in your dying married life, and I definitely think you need the chance to get out and enjoy yourself, but ultimately you're going to want a REAL relationship, a grown-up relationship. He's just not in a position to give you that. Furthermore, I have never seen such outright territorial behaviour from someone who actually has NO claim on you, woman! He might as well be peeing on your leg. WHat is the point of him thinking he can make your territory and yet he doesn't want anyone to know?
ReplyDelete