Saturday, February 19, 2011

Parties, Strippers, and the Blues

Last night was a rousing success! Coach was totally surprised by his dinner with family and friends and then his night out on the town!

We started the night off with dinner with two of his sisters and his two best friends.  His younger sister if you don’t remember is dating SoCo.  We’ve been around them before but not for such an extended period of time.  I don’t know how much Coach knows about me and SoCo and I’m really not trying to clarify the situation any time soon.  I am sure he’s heard that we used to hang out but I bet that is the extent of what he knows. 

Anyway, sitting at dinner watching SoCo and Coach’s younger sister cuddle and coo was quite entertaining.  They seem to be very much into each other and it’s pretty funny to watch him be all lovey-dovey and call her “babe” and stuff.  They are actually really cute together and I love Coach’s younger sister so as long as she’s happy it’s all good with me.  I wonder if she knows about me and SoCo.  Also, after I had a few drinks I kept cracking up remembering that SoCo liked for me to bite his cock.  It was a very weird experience. 

The next part of the night was hitting the bar that is the new “up and coming” place in town.  It’s become the place everyone goes to and is actually a pretty decent place all in all.  A lot of Coach’s friends turned up to celebrate his last night out and he was again very surprised. I think he was overwhelmed with how many people came out to see him off.  Even Gwyn came!

Coach is a great drunk.  He laughs, dances, acts silly, and basically goes out of his way to entertain you.  Last night he kept flexing his arm muscles and showing them off which made me laugh and honestly made me more than a little hot. You know I have a thing for nice arms!  Between laughing and talking with friends, we danced all night and even forced Gwyn out on the dance floor a few times before she was properly lubricated with alcohol. 

At one point I noticed Gwyn talking to one of the very few black guys in this country place. Trust her to go to a country bar and end up pulling in a black guy!  She’ll have to fill you in more on that one.  By the end of the night I was going to be the designated driver (I was very responsible and quit drinking earlier in the evening) and take Gwyn and her boy back to her car then drive home a friend of Coach’s.  Somehow after dropping off Gwyn, Coach’s friend convinced us to go to a local strip club to wind down the night.

I’m not exactly sure why I agreed other than that I thought it would be funny to watch Coach squirm.  He’s gets so uncomfortable about stuff like.  On Valentine’s Day I made him go in a Priscilla McCalls (a sex store) with me just to look around and proceeded to laugh so hard at his squeamishness as we browsed the sex toys that I had tears running down my face.  So we were going to this one club where the friend has a texting relationship with a stripper (did I mention this friend is a very uber-church goer?) but it was already closed.  Next we headed to a totally sleazy place in a nearby town.  About this time I got my safety text from Gwyn saying she was safe and sound at….. another strip club! HAHAHA! We got a good laugh out of that! 

So this strip club was totally gross and sketchy.  The girls by and large were, well LARGE.  Not at all what you’d expect even at a subpar strip club.  Almost all of them had saggy boobs and guts that were so not attractive.  Now I’ve only been to one other strip club but the women there were much more attractive.  I mean if you’re going to be a stripper you should at least have a tight body! I mean really!  And these girls got totally butt naked and did things like literally spread their vagina open for guys and girls to look at and throw money at.  It was so WERID!

We were only there about 10 minutes and Coach was on the edge of his seat the whole time.  He could hardly look around without tensing up.  It was quite funny.  At one point I had to go to the bathroom and he wasn’t about to let me walk around unattended so he walked with me. We went past this one part of the bar that was curtained off and I got a glimpse in and there was a guy zipping up his pants and a nasty stripper was putting her clothes back on. EWWWWWW!

This place was so sketchy and seedy, I honestly kept expecting there to be a fight or a gun flashed at any minute.  After maybe 25 minutes the friend was trying to get a lap dance from one of the few pretty strippers and Coach had had enough and said it was time to go. 

As I drove the friend home he kept talking about how he cheated on his wife all the time and about all these strippers he had “relationships” with. I so wanted to say, “You know those relationships are all about the money you give them right?”  I did take him to task for his behavior when he was saying how much he loved his wife and what a good marriage he had.

We dropped off the friend and then came back to my place and collapsed into bed because it was about 4:30 or so.  We both fell asleep in a split second and then Coach woke me up with the most delicious array of orgasms.  Lord I love that man!  Today we’ve just been running errands and hanging out for the most part. We were supposed to go out to a friend’s birthday party tonight but I think we’re both feeling more than a little blue about him leaving tomorrow so we’re opting to go the quiet route and have dinner and go see a movie.

Last night I did good at keeping the sad feelings at bay but it’s getting harder as the day goes on.  Tomorrow when he leaves to head to DC in the morning is going to be the pits. I’m so not looking forward to this morphing into a long distance relationship.  Even knowing he’ll be back on Friday isn’t helping much at this point. 



  1. I have expereinced bad strip clubs...Navy and Marine bases seem to be surrounded by them.

    There was one lady who sat there with her vagina spread while two drunk sailors threw quarters at her pussy trying to make them stick.

    At the end of the song she gathered up all the quarters.

    I almost wanted to cry. I was the designated driver for the two douche bags who were throwing the coins....it was sad.

    I also got yelled at by the nasty strippers for refusing lap dances...

  2. Whoa, sounds like a fun yet scary night at the clubs! I went to a gross one here with a gf a few months back after we unsuccessfully tried to get Gavin out of jail, it sounds like the same kind of place. Classy...lol.
    He's already coming back on Friday??? I think you'll be ok. ;)

  3. The best strip clubs every are up in Canada, Niagra Falls to be exact. Amazingly beautiful, full contact, and you get to tip them with pretty Canadian dollar coins.

    The scariest stripper I've ever met was in Vegas at a club I usually liked. She kept talking about her and her boyfriend (pimp) took a guy out to the desert, shook him down for all his cash, and left him there. Why would she share that? I don't know, but let's say I cut my visit short.

    It sounds like you put together a wonderful send-off for Coach. It's nice you pulled in so many friends to give him a night to remember (and a good morning too.)

  4. This may be a silly question, but I recently met an interesting girl who works part-time as a dancer at a strip club and I think she's not only beautiful, but funny and intelligent....do you think it's possible to actually date a stripper, or should I get my head examined?

  5. Sam - IDK. I guess the real question is are you comfortable dating someone who's shaking their boobs and rubbing their twat on other guys for money. I wouldn't be but I'm a jealous girl. I don't share well. I don't think anyone strips because they're whole and healthy from a mental standpoint any way. What are you going to do?