Is The Universe Fucking Kidding Me?

I had hardly posted my last entry and closed out my email telling Penn I never, ever wanted to see or hear from him again and what does he do? Texts me...I decided to respond and confront him. I thought it would be therapeutic for me (and it was). He apologized and said that since we had engaged in anal sex before, he thought after he stopped the first time and started again that it was ok. I explained why it wasn't ok and how he had taken it from sexual to controlling. He really didn't explain his shitty attitude at the end of the night, outside of saying he was embarrassed about how loud we (read me) were and his roommates were home. I didn't buy it and it all sounded like a lot of CYA BS to me. I did appreciate that he apologized. He told me that he hoped I didn't think he was an asshole (and that hopefully we had hung out enough for me to know this). Let me assure you guys, I do in fact think that he is. He also told me how much he enjoyed my company and doesn't want to end things on a bad note. I was fairly relentless and finally after I addressed the fact that he'd basically made me drive home totally drunk, he apologized again and we quit that conversation. I really wasn't in the mood to talk to him at all, but his apology did help. 

As I'm sitting on the beach texting with Miranda, I told her that I'd actually sort of expected something like this from Clark at some point, but not Penn. I was/am still shocked and stunned that he was so forceful and controlling. Incidentally, he did apologize for hurting me physically and emotionally but he's still an asshole and I'm over it. Literally about 5 minutes after this text, Clark texted me saying he wanted to see me. Um, NO. I responded that I thought we had agreed that we weren't going to try to see each other again. He sent a few more texts back, but I just ignored him. I've declared my life an asshole free zone and violators will all be ignored henceforth. 

Gavin showed up on the beach about 30 minutes after all of this. I told him that it wasn't cool that he came over last night all jacked up. He apologized as well and said it wouldn't happen again because he really likes coming over and doesn't want to fuck that up. I'm a little tired of apologies today. I kind of wish people would just quit fucking with me and then there would be NO need for them. He did make it up to me though. We talked for a little while and then he went home to nap. He came over when Chloe and I got home from the beach and steamed crab legs for us for dinner. I love crab legs. They are one of my most favorite foods and while he has no idea what went down last night, his timing was as usual spot on for just being around when I needed him. 

In other news that I've forgot to post due to the drama, Russell has asked me to meet one of his friends. I fairly readily agreed.  The guy seems to be a nice guy that he enjoys spending time with, but he has assured me has no intentions of being in a bf relationship with anytime soon. He's apparently still very much in the closet and Russell assured me that there would be no indicators of anything sexual when Chloe was around. He said that unless they are behind closed doors, there's no indicator period. He misses Bob and wants someone to hang out with and do friend things with as well and because I have Gavin in that capacity, I get where he's coming from. I'm curious to meet him. He's Filipino and apparently fairly quiet. I imagine this meeting will occur sometime in the next week or so, so I'll keep you guys posted. 

-Jules