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Thursday, February 10, 2011

I'm back. Well, sort of.

I've gone AWOL. I'm starting to drift back into reality but my head is still pretty screwy these days. Hawaii truly was a life changing experience. Although I'm not ready to write a full post, here's a little rundown of my post-Hawaii return to reality.....
  • Sex with Popeye was amazing. Bite marks, hair pulling and some big ole' hickeys.
  • I cried for 3 days after we got back from Hawaii. Literally cried for 3 days. Decided I've got to get the hell out of here and where better to go than paradise. Operation 'move to Hawaii' is in full swing.
  • The weekend after we returned, my best friend made the decision to take her 7 month old daughter off of life support. I saw her the night before she passed away which will forever be one of the worst experiences of my life. The weeks since then have been pretty awful. I never thought I would be reading the autopsy report of my friend's baby. Never in a million years. The service was the following weekend but things are still very touch and go. Some days I wake up fine, other days I cry on the way to work. The whole experience has taught me so much about life, about my friends, about what is really important.
  • The Ex told me that he has a baby with a girl he started dating after we broke up. Awesome.
  • I started going to a therapist. Haven't gone to one of those since my dad died.
  • When I got back from Hawaii I decided to cut off all of my team members - Romeo, The Inmate, The Ex, Truck Driver, The Barber...all of them. Numbers were deleted. I have hung out with a couple of them over the past week but I'll tell you about that in another post.
  • Since returning from paradise, I have completely lost my sex drive. Gone. Vanished. With everything going on it's not surprising to me but I sort of miss my old slutty ways. The good news, no the great news, is that it's like I'm a born again virgin. Boys mean nothing to me. They ask me to come over, I say no without even thinking twice. Or, if I relent and hang out with them, I make it very clear that there will be no hanky panky going on. So far it's gotten me a couple of free dinners and tons of text messages begging me to hang out. Strange how that works isn't it? Without sex, I have ALL the power. I must say it's pretty liberating.
I think that's about everything. Oh yeah, I've pretty much been a complete and total mess since we got back. But with all the bad comes a lot of good. I have a new perspective on life. I'm ready to make big changes. I'm not going to work in an office all day followed by a drive home on the most road rage inducing Avenue of all time just so I can buy a bigger tv or a chair that matches my sofa. Not. Going. To. Do. It. Did I mention it snowed here today?

Anybody want to (a) loan me $100k or (b) buy/rent my lovely townhome? This bitch is ready for the beach.

-Gwyn

3 comments:

  1. That fucking rocks.

    The move to Hawaii part...

    and the big changes part....

    The sex drive part is a little sad...however, I am sure that will return in time....it always does.

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  2. Go you! Sounds like you know what you want and you've got a plan in the works. You'll have to keep us posted :-)

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  3. Come on!!! I'm so excited you're moving here...sad that it's a process that you're having to go through though.
    -Jules

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