Do you ever do something that seems like a great idea and then a few minutes later you wonder what in the hell you were thinking?
Yesterday Sawyer emailed me. I haven’t heard from him in weeks other than seeing in him passing at Duckie’s one day when I was dropping off the kids. He was just chit chatting and he asked if I’d be in the office all day today. I said of course, I am a grown up, with a grown up job, which generally means they own my ass from 8-5 every day. Then he asked where my office was exactly.
I asked him what was with the 20 questions and he said he had to run some errands in the vicinity and thought he’d swing by to see me. Yeah right I sputtered (via email) and I went about my day. I mean I really didn’t think Sawyer would show up and I figured even if by some huge leap of the imagination he did, we’d be in a “safe” place that was no where near a bed. So fast forward to today and guess who busts up in my office – Sawyer.
I was pretty damn shocked he actually showed up. It’s ironic because the whole time Sawyer and I were involved I had a major fantasy about him coming to see me at my work and well, the fantasy got pretty dirty as you can imagine. We sat and talked for about 30 minutes (during which the only other person in the building left to go to lunch).
We talked about the kids, his job, my job (he asked a million questions), and even about how many stupid risks we took back in the day and how lucky we had been. And I’ll say Sawyer looked damn good, damn good. Like super freaking finger licking delicious good. Like Miranda’s hormones are on triple overload and it’s a really good thing I’m adamant about not being involved with him (or anyone) sexually or we’d have lived out my fantasy of sweeping everything off my desk top and him going to town on me right then and there. I digress…
It was time for Sawyer to leave and I showed him back to the door and he hugged me, for a long time. It was a very tight full body press (smooth movie dummy). I started to pull back and he slid his hands so they rested on my hips and next thing I knew I acted on instinct and grabbed his face and pulled him in for a kiss, albeit a chaste one. He looked shocked and let go when I stepped back then he reached out and pulled me back in and kissed me chastely again. I turned to walk away and he grabbed my face and pulled me in hard and kissed me like crazy for a few minutes.
My brain finally caught up with my body, I pulled away, and told Sawyer bye. I barely made it back to my office before my knees about gave out. In an alternate universe where we both were single at the same time and he didn’t turn out to be a total cheater, we’d be a smoking hot couple. In this one, not so much.