Monday, December 20, 2010

The Day Jules Got Pissy

I've about had it with the men in my life. I mean seriously, I am in great shape, pretty, extremely intelligent (if I do say so myself), easy going, fun, and require very little in return except hot sex. How many men would not kill to be on the receiving end of this deal? Why am I plagued with men that are forced to act like idiots?? I'm not a girl that requires conversations about where we are in our relationship, if you see us going anywhere...none of that shit. I don't do it because I don't get overly attached and why don't I get attached b/c I've learned over the years that people will always let you down when you set expectations for them. No Expectations=No Disappointments. Now, I'm currently pissed because my team of men are acting like total fucking retards and all I expect from them is the aforementioned hot sex something you would think any straight man with half a brain would trip over his dick to give me. I assumed it was low enough on the expectation list to warrant little disappointment. I was wrong.

First up on the shit list today, we have Penn. Penn is texting me with come over like right now kind of shit. Dude, I'm 34 and I live an hour from you. I have a job and a kid....I can't just drop it and run over to your apartment at your whim. I need some time to plan. I understand that you're 25 and work 2 wait jobs...but c'mon here. Tonight this is the shit he pulled...he texts me to find out what time I could come over (if I'm going to be around). I'm not "around"...I live an hour from you and I hate town. I only come to town to see you or if guests are on the island. Ok, let me back up. He actually started this last night and asked if I could come over. I told him I could, but it would be about 2 hours because I was in town and would have to go home, drop Chloe off, and come back. He asked if I could arrange anything sooner...um, no...I have my KID with me. What do you propose? I have her sit in the fucking car in town while I come fuck you? OR should she sit on the other side of your tent bed while we go at it?? So since he had to be up at 5:30am, we deemed last night not a good night. Back to this evening, I said I could be there around 9pm. He starts in on this crap about how he hates for me to drive that far. I said I didn't mind and then he just stops texting. I finally asked "Do you want me to come or not?". He said he did, but he didn't really want us to use his place because of his roommates and wasn't sure. THEN WHY DID YOU START TEXTING ME IN THE FIRST PLACE ABOUT IT??? He doesn't have a car, so it's not like he was proposing coming here. We briefly discussed him coming up here tomorrow night, but I don't know...I'm about fed up with his bullshit. It's been 2 weeks and he can't seem to get it together. It's not entirely his fault, but tonight was.

To top my night off, Gavin showed up. He's been fairly MIA since Wednesday night but that guy is staying with him and he's had a lot going on as have I so I haven't sweated his absence. Plus, I've been bleeding and sick, TMI I know. ;) He comes over about 9:30 and wants to get a blow job. I told him no, I'm tired of him coming over for his needs and ignoring mine. If he wanted to fuck, great...but I'm done just servicing him. He was all like I brought you this hot guy over Wednesday and that was so amazing and I just want to have you blow me now because the gf and that guy and some other friends are up at my house. THEN WHY DID YOU COME DOWN HERE?? He said to me, "Babe, you've got to just let me be me.". I flew hot then....I was already ignoring him but that just set my ass on fire. I spat at him, "I do let YOU be YOU and how fucking dare you imply anything else?". He said I was right and said that sometimes the sex gets emotional. I reminded him that I've never, ever...not even once...asked for any emotional thing from him. He replied he knows, it's him. I pretty much told him to go home after that. He kissed me and asked me not to be mad.  I was just done with the conversation at that point, but I did leave him with the parting sentence of "I really don't get you...most men would kill to be in your shoes". He said, "That's the crazy thing about relationships...you don't always understand each other...I don't even understand me." and walked out. I told him to lock the door on his way, implying don't bother returning right now. I can't help it that he has some feelings for me that he can't seem to figure out what to do with. I have in no way, shape, or form ever asked for anything more than sexual stuff from him. Obviously, there is an emotional component to our thing, but it's mostly coming from him. I'm almost at the point where I wish the gf would stay and he would just leave me alone. I think he's an idiot for choosing to be with her and I'm over being part of that drama.

Where's the mindless, easy, uncomplicated sex? Owen was doing a side job this week, so I didn't get to see him and now the kids are out for 2 weeks. Penn and Gavin have some ass kissing to do to get back into my good graces. I mean, honestly...why is this hard? I'm NOT dating either of them...I don't particularly care to "date" either of them...I just want to fuck them. Figure your shit out guys or I'm moving on. It's a new year and I expect a year of hot sex and if you can't deliver it...I'll be happy to find someone who will. The motto for 2011 is "Easy Come, Easy Go".  I will not be disappointed in 2011 by stupid men because if you act like a moron, I will replace you.

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