So my mom has slowly but surely been preparing herself to date again. For a while she’s been “not dating” this old family friend of ours – I’ll call him Uncle. Uncle was a family friend of my parents since they were teenagers. For some reason as a kid I always thought he had a crush on her but she always kind of looked at him as one of her kids. HA!
So over the last several we’ve all noticed Uncle being around more and more. They started by getting breakfast together on Sundays then they started doing dinner and eventually he’s had her riding double on his motorcycle several weekends. Several times now she and I have had a discussion about how her behavior looks like she’s dating him and she’s admitted he’s asked more than once about how us kids feel about them dating. She always says she laughs and says they are not dating.
However, despite my advice and even hearing it from Gwyn too my mom really hasn’t changed her behavior towards Uncle. I’m sure he thinks she’s just not “ready” to date yet and if he hangs around long enough and keeps acting like they are dating she’ll give in and admit it.
Last week or so I tried to convince her to get on Plenty of Fish just to look around. Apparently she got on PoF this weekend because she’s left a very odd Facebook status about being confused. When I emailed her about it, this is the response I got…
I went out on the Plenty of Fishes and set up a profile and it really ended up bothering me. All these needy men and most looking for a long term relationship and all older and it was so yuk. I realized that I just need leave things alone and me too. I am not that lonely and I really don't want somebody dictating my time or defining who I am cause I don't know that answer yet. Dad and I were such an extension of each other and kept the "dangerous" parts of each other in check that I need to be just me alone - in charge of me - for a long while yet.
I'm not comfortable with this Uncle thing either. He still thinks we are an item! He asked me Saturday night if I was going to go to Bike week with him and when I said probably not unless I just came down for Friday and Saturday to ride around with him and that I'd have to look into getting a room. He said you can stay with me - there's 2 beds - and even if there was only one you could still stay with me! Yikes! I just looked at him and laughed! Ugh and ugh that'd be like sleeping with a cousin who you like but not really.
How weird and funny! I told her she needed to just relax and that there was nothing wrong with looking around. It doesn’t mean she has to date anyone or be serious with anyone and that most people on PoF aren’t looking for a long term relationship despite what they claim. I also told her again she’s got to change her behavior or Uncle will never get it.
What also made me laugh most is the line about how her and my dad kept the “dangerous” parts of each other in check. I’m not sure what my dad’s dangerous part was but I’m pretty sure my mom’s has to do with sex. See, she’s always been really open about sex with me so I know she was pretty much a ho back in the days before she met my dad. Yes I just called my mom a ho. At least I know I come by my promiscuity naturally! LOL! I bet she got on PoF and started to think about what it would be like to have sex with people other than my dad and got scared poor thing.
Good lord. I just had the realization that I very well may have to have the safe sex conversation with her one day soon!