Tuesday, February 23, 2010


Miranda and I were chatting on Facebook today and were discussing the upside of divorce is that you no longer have to deal with mother-in-laws (or any in-law) for that matter. This sucks for Russell because he actually likes my parents better, but we're still bffs so I'm sure he'll always be around them in some capacity. Anyway, his mother kind of sucks. Her husband (Russell's dad) died the year before we got married. I'd never had much interaction with her before this, but once we started dating and got married, she and I became pretty close. She sort of came into her own after he died and I would really enjoy talking to her and spending time with her...until she met her current husband. This guy is such an asshole. He's a total religious nut job - belongs to one of those mega, cult churches. I'm not a fan of his and neither is Russell, but we've had to mostly play nice for years. NOT ANYMORE, FOLKS! Well, not for me...the gloves are OFF! Actually, I never ever have to see or talk to him again if I don't want to, but my mother-in-law is a different story. She's coming to visit next month. The real kicker with me right now is that she has yet to call me since CRH told her about our pending divorce. I mean, really...would you NOT call your daughter-in-law if your son calls to tell you he's gay and his marriage just isn't working out?! I must expect too much, but then again I mostly ignore her calls anyway. She came to visit us a few years ago and really pissed me off...I don't think I ever fully got over it.
Here's the story...feel free to judge from any perspective you desire. Russell had a kidney stone about 3 or 4 years ago. Chloe was 3 or so and we lived in Durham, NC...which was an hour from my family. I was working full time and Chloe was in day care. This kidney stone thing drug on and on for far longer than I should have let the doctors get away with, but that's another story. Finally they decided to do that surgery where they break up the stone. My mother-in-law freaked that Russell was having surgery and informed us that she was coming up to help and be here. I wish she had stayed....really I do.
She got there the evening before the surgery. I had worked all day that day, back to back appointments, had gone to get Chloe, and arrived home to her. It was dinner time and I don't cook...never have, but in times like that...I'm forced. I don't know why I didn't get take out, but I didn't. I went to the store and got stuff for dinner, came home and made dinner...all while she sat around.  My own mother would have first of all cooked dinner for me, but if for some reason she didn't, she damn sure would have done the dishes or helped get Chloe to bed. Not my mother-in-law...she continued to sit at the table while I washed all the dishes, took Chloe upstairs for a bath, and put her to bed. Then the real drama started, Russell told her that we needed her to stay home with Chloe tomorrow because we had to be at the hospital before day care opened. She was super pissed...she thought SHE was going to the hospital with him and that I was going to be home with Chloe...wtf? She finally gave in and we went to bed.
The next day, we left for the hospital and everything went fine. I'd had very little sleep the night before and when we got home all I wanted to do was just collapse, but Russell needed his prescriptions filled and it was lunch time. Again, do you think she offered to help with either of these?? Nope...I ran out for both, came home, we ate, and then she announced she had to get on the road. Chloe hasn't napped since she was 18 months old...so there was still no collapsing for me. Please someone tell me why in the crap she bothered to come in the first place?! THEN on the way home after she rushed out like her house was on fire, she calls me from the outlets where she stopped to shop to see how Russell was doing.
Yeah, I'm not going to miss her....


  1. I know exactly how you feel! I don't miss my ex's family AT ALL- in fact that was one of the best parts of the divorce! Even when I got along with him, I never got along with them. They were mean nasty people and I am sure they still curse my name, but they shoudl thank me- it was probably the only time in history their son was getting laid! LOL
    My current MIL is really sweet but a tad useless when it comes to helping. Not only is she not a good cook or house cleaner, she can't drive. So I feel your pain. But at least she's nice to me, and her husband is atheist, so that makes up for it. LOL

  2. What a crazy story Jules! I can't complain too much. My in-laws have been pretty great all in all but they are so different from my family. I mean you get 8 adults in a room and they all sit and silently watch the TV. Not in my family. 8 adults in the room means ear-splitting laughing, talking, arguing, picking, etc.

    Bless their hearts though, they really messed up at least 2 of their 3 children. Haha!

  3. Wait, I think I know that woman - is her name spelled B-I-A-T-C-H ?