Jules' Beginning

A few years ago I became bored in my marriage. I'm married to my best friend, which complicates things a lot. My husband is Bi (well, that was his story at the time) and he wasn't showing me any intimate attention. Admittedly I had gotten fat after having our daughter, but I later learned it wasn't me (seriously). Three years ago I started having affairs with other married men. It seemed safer that way with less emotional connection, thus not really jeopardizing my marriage. By the way, I've lost all the weight plus some in the last 3 years too - infidelity does have it's benefits!
In 2008, we moved to Hawaii and I kept having affairs in the new location. In January of last year, I met Owen and have been having THE most intense, hot affair with him every since. In April of last year, my husband and I decided to have an open marriage so that he could see other men and I could see Owen without guilt. I did not come clean with him about my past affairs until early this year. We tried lots of things to keep our marriage going, but ultimately I still wasn't happy. We even saw several men together, but that's a story for another day. ;)
During this time, Russell (my husband) started seeing a man that he was essentially dating. They were hanging out and doing things. I became jealous because despite my infidelity, I wasn't emotionally committed to anyone else. I threw a fit as only a Southern woman can and told him that if he continued to see this guy that I would leave. I had never, ever threatended that before but I was pissed. On January 26th, 2010, I discovered that he was in fact still seeing this guy and I went ballistic. I was leaving to go home that night for a visit and I told him that I was packing up Chloe (our daughter), coming home, and he could do wtf ever he wanted. Then I went to the beach and decided that I really love Hawaii and that I don't want to leave...ever. I also decided that while Chloe would throw her father under a bus and move back to NC in a New York minute, it wasn't really fair to either of them for me to make that decision. Then, I threw him out. I told him to go live with that mf is he wanted him so badly. I should mention that I have quite a temper. About an hour after I told him that, I realized I was giving him the keys to the candy store...he wasn't getting off that easily. Plus, I knew it would be really hard for me to have to ever see/meet this guy and there is no way in hell Chloe was ever going to either. So, I finally told him that I would stay in Hawaii if he would pay for it all for as long as I need until I either finish school or get a full time job. He agreed and we've decided to live together as roommates in a larger house (3bdrms) for the time being. We have not told Chloe about our situation yet and for now we are muddling through in our 2bdrm house, still sleeping in the same bed. It's weird...just weird.
During my trip home to NC, I told most of our friends and family about our separation. At dinner one night with some friends from High School, my friend, Miranda, mentioned that she and her husband were splitting up. It was the craziest timing! We both started talking about our situations and while we hate it for the other one, it's really nice to have someone to talk about this with and process. As we have processed, we have decided to blog about our stories. She's got some hilarious ones, but those are hers to tell. We decided to start a blog and each post periodically about the day to day of the collapse of our marriages, the infidelities, the separations, and the divorces. All names have been changed to protect the innocent and the guilty.
That's the short version....more details to come, so stay tuned!

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