Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Amazing Grace

When I first got his message it intrigued me. Just the right amount of confidence mixed with self deprecating humor and it was obvious he’d actually read my profile and took a moment to think of more interesting things than saying “you’re hot” or “hey beautiful.” I looked at his profile before responding and it was just as intriguing as that first message he sent. He’s smart, funny, college educated, has two kids, divorced about the same length of time as me, 6’ tall, brown hair (though it’s shaved right now) and brown eyes. The only thing that made me pause was him stating that religion was a big factor in his life.

It’s not that I’m not religious, I certainly have a strong faith in God and I’ve been in and out of church over the years. But it’s not something I define myself by. I have lots of questions and very few answers so I hoped that it wouldn’t be a big clash between us. I replied and it set off a flurry of emails back and forth over the last two weeks. Smart, funny, intriguing emails that made me listen anxiously to hear the tell-tell ping of a notification that I had a new email on my phone.

Emails turned to texting and marathon phone calls. Like multiple three hour phone calls. Our conversations were flirty, serious, and everywhere in between. We have talked in depth about religion, our kids, our divorces, sex, what we want out of life… You name it and we’ve touched on it at this point. His points of view are passionate, his beliefs strong. Even though we differ on some major topics he listens and asks amazing questions that make me think and find new ways of explaining how I feel. Talking to him challenges me and excites me in a way I haven’t found in many other men.

Saturday night we went out on our first date. We met for dinner at my favorite Thai restaurant then went for a ride on his motorcycle out to a lake. The intimacy of my arms wrapped around him as the wind blew past was intense. We finished the night with an evening stroll through a beautiful local park where we sat under the stars in a gazebo and talked for two hours about everything and anything.

In that gazebo he kissed me for the first time. He pulled me close and stared into my eyes. As he lowered his head to mine, his hands threaded through my hair and pulled my face up to meet his for a powerful kiss. We strolled back through the park, holding hands, stopping to kiss every so often. We said good night and as I pulled into home he called me to make sure I was home safe.

This set off yet another three hour conversation and us making plans to see each other again next weekend as soon as our kid schedules line back up. Yesterday he said he didn’t want to wait. He asked if I’d mind driving the 40 minutes to his house and we could watch a movie after his kids were in bed.

As I drove there I was filled with a new level of anticipation. I’ve been excited about people before but I’ve learned to be cautious until you have spent some real time talking to them. But he seems to just be getting better and better. I pulled up and he was waiting on his doorstep with a glass of wine for each of us. We tried to watch a movie but we kept talking and laughing.

We walked outside to enjoy the night and ended up laying a blanket on the ground and laying under the stars for the next three hours. We talked and laughed and kissed. He’s aggressive in his touch yet restrained. As we lay there kissing until I swear I was breathless. I felt like he was devouring me. If ever someone was attempting to “own” me this was it. Things got heated but he never went beyond what it should have been. His restraint is admirable and he’s a far stronger person that I am. At more than one point I’d have given in to his every wish and command.

Today I’m covered in tender spots from his bites and hands on my face, neck, and shoulders. I keep finding myself pressing on them and thinking of how they got there. It’s like everything has gone into a soft focus and some big swell of music should be playing in the background lol. I know this post sounds like a romance novel but I can’t help it. It’s like he’s tapped some hedonistic, sensual side of Miranda that’s been below the surface just waiting to come out. Maybe it was there waiting, mired under the muck of Coach and now finally being free of him it’s taking over everything I do, say, and think.

At any rate, I’m seeing him again tonight. There’s no way I could resist his invitation. I’ve got work things to do the rest of the week so after tonight we’ll have to wait for Saturday. And oh the things I can imagine for Saturday.

Ladies and gentleman, please say hello to The Christian.


1 comment:

  1. first time I ave ever commented on your blog altough I've been lurking for a long time. my fingers are crossed for you :)