Dating After 40: Do Any of Us Really Know What We Are Doing?

Remember Gavin? Well I managed to find him in a different person but not really... So, I am staying with a friend for a few weeks and she has a neighbor who moved into her building a few doors down and has been hanging out with her.  We all went out Memorial Day to this community event and before and after drank copious amounts of wine and cocktails. I probably had two bottles of wine, if not more. Point being, I'm blaming this one on the alcohol, lol. We hang out and finally my friend, Polly, tells me that this guy wants to sleep with me, in front of the guy. He took that as his cue to start kissing me and he was a good kisser so it went from there into him playing with me and finally me going back to his apartment (by that I mean some guy's apartment that his brother takes care of). We fuck in his brother's bed, I later find out because he sleeps on the couch. His brother was quite unimpressed with my ability to squirt and I felt bad for him once I realized it was in fac...

So Jules is BACK! The story doesn't have a happy ending, but Chloe and I are safe and that's all the matters. I missed a lot of red flags with The Fisherman, I mean a lot. Hindsight is 20/20, love is tunnel vision. I knew early on that he had anger issues, but he was willing to admit it and actually went to see a therapist once early on in our relationship, but that faded quickly and the anger became rage. In February 2013, he lost his fishing job. It was a devastating turn for him that he didn't do well through, his confidence was shot. He became financially dependent on me and I allowed it. I was in love and thought I was going to marry him. In April, my dad passed away. It was a really horrible, sad, tough time and he did his best to get me through it. Again in hindsight, I mostly got myself through it. Anyway, we were set to get married that September despite all the chaos. Right before our wedding, like 3-4 weeks before we had the first of three major fights. We foug...

Here we are amost five months later. Jules is happily married and coping with Russell leaving the island. Gywn is bursting with pregnancy - shes having a boy! -and counting down the days till her hubby comes home. And Miranda, well Miranda is...happy. As strange of an emotion as she can imagine, Miranda is happy. Peabody has pulled out all the stops and completely committed himself to her. It's about damn time lol. Maybe fairy tales can cone true after all? Fate has taught Miranda to be cautious but she can't help feeling cautiously optimistic at the moment. 

It's been ages since our last post. I'm not sure that anyone even checks in here anymore. At any rate if you're curious..... Jules married the fisherman this fall! They had a gorgeous wedding and are happily moving forward in their new life. Gwyn recently eloped with the most amazing boyfriend ever (now husband - it was a guy she met right about the time she dropped off the blog) and she's got a bun in the oven now! Yep hitched and barefoot and pregnant. And deliriously happy. As for me, Miranda, the one most yearning for the happy ending, well I'm still working on it. Peabody and I had a very surprising and hard break up in late spring. I spent the summer very depressed, attempting to move on and briefly dating a friend of his. In the late summer we reconnected and he asked for a second chance. After much discussion, I agreed to give him one. The summer without him was truly awful. There were a lot of dark days but it was also very much a time of needed growt...

Earlier I was thinking about Duckie and what a dipshit he is. Note, recently we battled over child support because his pay has increased and mine has remained flat the last few years and he didn’t deserve (according to state guidelines) what he wanted. Yes, I pay him child support (and I just finished three years of alimony) all because he is a slacker who was content to sit back and work low end jobs and never try to improve his career until I left him. Note again – I won the child support disagreement by the way.  I digress. Anyways I was thinking about that whole situation and for some reason started to reflect on my decision to leave him. I can remember after I first told him we had a problem and I didn’t have any feelings towards him anymore. I spent much of the next six weeks wading through my grief over my dad’s suicide and mulling over what exactly I WAS feeling.  I can remember creeping around the idea of divorce. Grieving for the idea of the kids having t...

Ever had a moment that stopped you in your tracks and you just knew it was what you’d always dreamed about, that you were in exactly the right place at the right time?  I’ve had more than a few of those with Peabody and another really great one last night. He asked me to come over for dinner and we were just hanging out at his house. He was grilling and we were drinking wine listening to some of our favorite music.  We talked all through dinner and cleaning up and ended up sitting in his living room laughing and talking for another hour while we reminisced over our recent amazing trip to Hawaii.  His favorite book is On the Road by Jack Kerouac.  He’s been after me to read it and I just haven’t had time yet.  Peabody told me he had something different for us to do and asked me if I’d ever listened to a book on tape. I told him I hadn’t and he said he’d been planning to read the book to me (omg read the book to me!!  My inner nerd is still doing a ...

Tomorrow Peabody and I leave for our Hawaiian adventure and I can’t believe it’s finally here!  I am so excited to get back to Hawaii and see the girls and meet each other’s menfolk.  It’s so random and crazy that after a wild three years we are all seemingly settled down and happy at the same time.  Our trip is two-fold. Half the time we will be on Oahu with the girls and half the time we will be hiking/camping along the Napali coast on Kauai. I cannot freaking wait for either part!  I’ve camped quite a bit with Peabody now but this is going to be true ultralight backpacking over some rough terrain. I’m both excited and terrified and I think this trip is going to be a very significant moment in mine and Peabody’s relationship. I’ve gotten the outdoors life down pat for the most part.  I’m not worried about being away from a shower for four days or not being able to truly wash my hair. I’m not worried about wearing dirty, sweaty clothes more than once ...